Thursday, February 14, 2013

Will You Be My...What was it again?



I’m posting on Vile Day—totally unexpected, but when the brain travels off into oblivion, you’re kind of forced to comply. 

Mind starting wandering around the long-lost notion of the question, Will You Be My Valentine? I realized that hardly anyone ever asks it anymore. Nowadays, Valentine’s Day is all about the ‘gimme factor.’

Women expect gifts (not all, but there are some seriously obnoxious ones out there who live to rub the single gal’s nose in her 14th extravaganza, like it was some personalized Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade held solely for her benefit. Um, that was a bit of a wheeze, huh? Sorry). I think it’s probably the result of so much commercialization for the day itself—strange how advertising can effectively mold expectations, isn’t it? The consequence? Men feel obligated to buy things for this highly superficial day, then expect (or at least hope) for sex in return. Hence, you have the gimme factor: She expects gifts (gimme); he feels obligated to buy, expecting/hoping for sex as his reward (gimme). Where’s the love in that? And this is what has me pissy about Valentine’s Day—a day that was once something sweet and innocent.

Remember those days when Valentine’s was nothing more than decorating a white paper bag with red & pink hearts cut out of construction paper or colored in with markers? How about when you’d fill in those little tear off Valentine’s that featured the Peanut’s Gang or Garfield or the Care Bears and slip them into those carefully decorated paper bags now attached to the back of your chair or hanging somewhere along the front of the classroom? Those are the days I miss—when Valentine’s was small and simple, yet full of meaning.

I asked a guy friend when he last actually asked a girl to be his Valentine. His answer? “Not since first grade.” So, I pushed a little more, asking why he doesn’t think to ask that iconic Valentine’s question. His answer? “That’s just it—I don’t think about it. I just know I better buy some flowers or chocolate or some sh*!”

Welcome to a now fully manufactured day.

I miss the white paper bags.

13 comments:

  1. Valentine's Day is filled with pressure. When I was a reporter, one year all the female reporters in the newsroom received flowers at work -- except one. Her husband had died in December. I felt terrible.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Oh, God, that's so sad. :( Bless her, that must have been terrible.

      There is a lot of pressure and, truth be told, there shouldn't be. The root of the day is love, basically, right? So why all the stress and pressure?! It's crazy.

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  2. You make a good point. And today, i noticed, for instance, that most of the chocolate stores near my work were more crowded than the health stores that usually are during the day. Pathetic.

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  3. I remember those days. I didnt make out much better then.

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    1. Awwww!!! :( That's so sweet and sad at the same time!!! I've never been particularly fond of this day--it's just so sucky on so many levels. :/

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  4. I miss the white paper bag days too. It was so much simpler and sincere back then. Now it's who has the biggest bouquet or the most gigantic balloon or stuffed animal. Give me a break! I asked my bestie (a guy) this morning if he'd be my Valentine and he said yes. LOL -Platonic Valentines. But VALENTINE nonetheless! Happy Happy Valentine's Day to you love! Keep your chin up, I am! :)

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    1. You're SO right! It's become a competition, too!!! Wow. I hate that, I really, really, REALLY do.

      Aww, that's sweet of your bestie! BFF and I both hate it too much to even be platonic Valenyucks. lol

      You know how I look at it? It's one day closer to Daytona and the return of #88!!! lol :)

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  5. *SQUEAL* Two posts in a week? My week is complete. lol

    I just had one of my better V-Days in a very long time, thanks to my parents. :o)

    I remember the V-Days of old. Sad part, it was always a popularity contest, and I was not the winner. But they seemed so simple and not this consumeristic holiday that makes singles very aware of their singleness.

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  6. I miss the simpler days too. Where everyone gave and received, nothing was expected. I've never had a valentine so I don't know much about the question of will you be my valentine except that from my standpoint it seems to be kinda like fairy tales almost mad up or out of reach.

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  7. I loved those white paper bags. I loved decorating and finding just the right Valentine for everyone in the class. I miss the Valentine's where my mother owned a flower shop...I always had such great arrangements back then.

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  8. Dear Frisky Virgin,

    Where have you been? < / 3 I mean, I realize I took like a year off from blogging, but that's no excuse. I demand a new entry soon, especially after I check in on you to find this screed about my birthday! howdareyou.

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    1. Aww, hi Steve! Yeah, it's been a stressful stretch, and I was in a rant-y sort of mood, I reckon. BUT I didn't know Valentine's Day was your birthday!!! OMG. Just separate my V-Day diatribe from your birthday, okay? Please? I don't consider the two one and the same, promise. <3

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