Truth Is Thursday: Soda Strong

Truth Is: I didn’t write this in my post about Dale’s win on Sunday, but did y’all notice he not only won on Father’s Day, but he did it in a mostly black and white car (the colors of his dad’s iconic car)? Goosebumps.

Truth Is: Soda update! I’m still in the Soda Free Zone, and I’ve FINALLY shaken the headaches! Yay! For a while, I didn’t think they would ever go away.

Truth Is: All my exes live in Texas. It’s a song…by George Strait…it’s in my head…can’t shake it. Think it’s because of that cute commercial where the couple drives across a bunch of different states.

Truth Is: Dallas quotes of the week come from the one and only, J.R. Ewing.

“My friends are in the Statehouse. My enemies are gonna be harder to find.”

Truth Is: And let’s not forget this one…

“Bullets don’t seem to have much of an effect on me, darlin’”

For those who didn’t watch Dallas back in the day, J.R. was referencing the wildly successful, “Who Shot J.R.?” episode.

Brilliant...

...so unlike this week’s Truth Is post—so sorry for the boredom factor. I’m hoping things will be picking up very soon now. ;)

Truth Is Thursday: True Blood, Sweat, & Soda

Truth Is: I've stopped soda cold turkey. 3 days and counting. It doesn't sound like much, I know, but for me, it's an achievement. lol I'm sure the twitching will stop eventually. ;) And the headaches...

Truth Is: True Blood returns this weekend! Vampires, weres, and shifters, oh my!

Truth Is: Dale Jr. is having a seriously awesome season. Consistency is absolutely key, and he's just cruising right along. The wins are around the corner. Patience and consistency will lead to winner's circle.

Truth Is: Congrats to the Thunder! After the way they played the Mavs last year, I knew they would be a huge force in no time.

Truth Is: Okay, Celtics...win it. Win it for Eva and BFF! GO BOSTON!

Truth Is: My mom loves her Kindle...you know, the thing you read on...except she uses it to play games. LOL

Truth Is: I'm just going to leave y'all with a little True Blood preview...and a pic to, well, wet your appetite (all puns totally intended).

Trailer One: 



Trailer Two: 



"Must be Thursday!"

Joe Manganiello; Photo Credit: Men's Health UK

Truth Is Thursday: The Eyes Have It

Truth Is: I *think* I see the light at the end of the tunnel where my blogging absence is concerned. I CAN'T WAIT to catch up and read blogs again. I MISS YOU ALL.

Truth Is: My printer ran out of ink at the absolute worst moment. Here's the thing: it didn't even let me know it was running low. Usually, the print will look lighter or something. Nope, nothing. It looked fabulous, then just stopped and said, "Black Ink Out." I pushed the on/off about a zillion times because I didn't trust the whole "black ink out" thing. Still, nothing. I'm convinced there's black ink still in there somewhere.

Truth Is: Wilderness Guy wanted to teach me how to pluck a chicken.  I can't emphasize the "no" enough, here.

Truth Is:  Never, ever have a cheesy nacho snack at night. Made this mistake. Won't make it again. There's a reason I'm not a snack person, apart from cereal. Must stick to cereal.

Truth Is: Mom was all excited about some diner-like mustard and ketchup bottles she found. She said they were super cute...with faces. Sadly, I didn't remember this little detail over the weekend. Had I remembered, I might have avoided a rather spastic me moment.

I walked into the kitchen, opened the fridge for some milk, and was face-to face with this:

My reaction: Funky-freaked face, yelp, stumble, and butt-slam into the dishwasher. I swear, for a second, I thought something had possessed the contents of the fridge, like some Poltergeist movie.

The next time I face the blinking duo will be Memorial Day Weekend, and though I will not be spooked again, I'm pretty sure they will take great pleasure in mocking me...don't they have a mocking kind of look? Don't get me wrong, they're cute and all, but...they are a little creepy when you're not expecting them. lol

Anyway, I hope everyone has a WONDERFUL Memorial Day! God Bless all of our brave men and women, past, present, and future.

Truth Is Thursday: Life Is Quite Nosy

Truth Is: Dear Willoughby, I have so much to say to you, but I'm not going to whisper a single syllable. You simply cannot see what you do. It's okay. Humans are beautifully complex that way. But I cannot, and will not, be your Marianne. No, this Marianne needs her Colonel Brandon.

Truth Is: CSI: Miami was cancelled! Very sad. No more Horatio. :(

Truth Is: I miss my Mavs. When I think back on this time last year…the stress, nausea, pacing, heart pounding, and rocking back and forth on the edge of my seat; the highs and lows of wins and losses; the utter thrill of victory…it's a great feeling. Good luck to all you fans whose teams are still in the hunt--enjoy every single second, good, bad, and in between. There's nothing like it.

Truth Is: Mom got her Kindle for Mother's Day…with "wee-fee." She's hilarious with it. At first, she was completely clueless. Now, she's zooming around the thing like she's had it for years. Dad and I are very proud of her.

Truth Is: Life sent me a message on Mother's Day. Not joking.

Woke up Sunday to a little text jingle.

"Hmm, wonder who that is," I said, checking the number. "Don't recognize that number, but it is local. Maybe BFF got another new number."

I clicked on the text and very nearly fell out of bed.

"HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! Love, Life"

"Screw you, Life. Screw you." Yep, that was my spontaneous reaction.

Being single doesn't suck--beats being alone in a relationship. Still, Life needs to stay the hell out of it and shut the blank-ity-blank up.

Truth Is Thursday: Empty Words, Scum, and An Odd Crush

Truth Is: I've been getting quality sleep...yay...just not enough...boo.

Truth Is: I know I didn't get to mention this earlier, but my Mavs are back in the playoffs! Whoop!

Truth Is: Dear Sorta Friend, if you truly want a forever kind of love, as you claim, then you are going to have to learn to keep your word.  Women cannot possibly fully trust you if you maintain the practice of empty words.  I'm not sure why this is so difficult for you to see, and why you insist on blaming the women for not handing over the keys to their heart.  Trust is earned.  Empty words?  So not the way to earn it. I should know, since you pulled that act on me a time or two.

Truth Is:  Dale Jr. finished 7th this past Sunday. So loving the consistently good finishes.

Truth Is:  Have y'all heard about the website that encourages married people to cheat on their spouses?  Scummy.  Yeah, well, now it's apparently offering $1 million to any woman who can prove she has had sex with Tim Tebow.  Double scummy.  As you may know, Tim has stated he is waiting until marriage to have sex.

Why do this?  I mean, he is who he is.  Let him be.  Let him live HIS life the way HE sees fit.  Perhaps some people on the opposite end of the moral spectrum--like those who encourage infidelity--feel threatened by people like Tim Tebow. And why?  He's not bothering them. He made a choice--we ALL make choices that are best for us, for our lives, and no one, not a single person on this planet, has the right to make you feel bad about it. 

Truth Is: So, my mom wants a Kindle with--are you ready?--"Wee Fee" capability.  Wee Fee instead of Wi-Fi (why, fye--rhymes with eye).  lol

Truth Is: I have some unusual crushes.  My latest one? Horatio Caine on CSI: Miami.  *blushes*  He's just so manly man-man, totally protective, with a great voice, and super one-liners.  Of course, I totally wouldn't turn away Eric Delko from CSI: Miami, either. ;)

Truth Is Thursday--Zzzzz

Truth Is:  Need sleep.  Dear Upcoming Weekend:  Kindly deliver the relaxation.  The past couple of weeks have kicked my rear from the first minute of daylight on Monday.  What is it about the start of Spring that triggers the mouth of hell to grin and open wide?  Ugh.  Can I get a “Thank goodness it’s almost Friday?”

Truth Is: My Mavs are one win away from a playoff lock.  I know they are the defending champs, and last season was a dream come true, so I'm not greedy--I just really want them in the playoffs. 

Truth Is: Dale finished 10th in Texas last weekend.  Top 10 ranks as consistently solid finishes, though I do wish Texas had served him up a win. 

Truth Is: Zzzzzz...oops...sorry...dozed off for a sec. 

Truth Is:  Friend confessed to me that a woman he had been dating completely fooled him, i.e. She wasn't a very nice person...AT ALL.  Guess who told him as much over a year ago? Yep, that would be me.  Read her like a book.  Although, I will say, some of the things she did and said even surpassed my rather unfavorable impression of her.  Piece. Of. Work.

As with anyone, ya gotta remove the wool and look for that person's true nature.  You'll either find a sweet (or saucy, but sweet)  little lamb, or a manipulating wolf-beast.  If the latter, run.  Immediately. 

Truth Is: I'm hoping for all it's worth to return to regularly scheduled blogging next week.  I've missed everyone. 

Truth Is: I was watching Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason.  It was in the DVD player, and, well, I was too dang lazy to get up and change it out.  You know what I totally overlooked about the film?  The song Like A Virgin makes a big appearance.  Like A Virgin...in a film about a perpetually single, 30-something dating disaster.  On the plus side, she does end up with Mr. Darcy, right?  So...bright side....look on the bright side.  We won't talk about the fact that when I turned off the DVD and flicked to the Big Band music station, Bing Crosby (crush of mine) was singing Have You Met Miss Jones?" No joke.  Sometimes the bright side is a little too bright.

Truth Is: Zzzzz...huh?  Oh.  Must have nodded off...again. 

Truth Is Thursday: Single Gal Mind Dump and M&M's

Truth Is: What’s up with the wedding marathons on television?  Seriously.  Channels like Hallmark and Lifetime and, I don’t know, others, have had wedding weekends since January. 

Pretty sure one of them begged viewers to celebrate “Wedding Month.” Huh, what, and more huh?  June is the official wedding month.  Not January, not February (apart from V-Day, which is like engagement day), not March, April, or May—June, and ONLY June. 

And I know this isn’t just annoying to me as a single because even my mom said it was ridiculously obnoxious.  Now, when my fairytale-happy, loves-to-watch-happy, happy, joy, joy-movies mom says as much, you know it must be white-dress and butter cream icing overkill.

Sorry.  Had to just, you know, get that off my mind because…

Truth Is: …my brain is standing room only.  I’m surprised I don’t have to WD-40 the dang thing.  It’s just going and going and going and going. It won’t shut the heck up and let me be, much less sleep.  

Truth Is:  Kind of getting sick of the: “You’ll need x-y-z when you have kids one day…if you have them, I mean.”  Oh, the “Your clock must be ticking about now, right?” is always pleasant.  And let’s not forget the classically annoying, “Well, you’ll probably find him someday.”

Anyone have ANY suggestions for how to respond to those statements?  I'm getting tired of responding with the plastered smile and resigned nod.  I don’t think they’re trying to be mean or anything—it’s more like they forgot about their stay in Singletonville.

These same women HATED when the Marrieds made those kinds of statements/questions.  Yet, here they are, cuddling up to the ideology they once loathed, while busily inserting it in my life. 

I sometimes wonder if marriage acts as a partial lobotomy on the single gal mindset for some women.  

Truth Is: My Mavs play the Heat tonight. *Hurl* If we hadn't annihilated them in the Championship last year *bliss*, I'd be much more nervous.  Jason Terry is rumored to be breaking out the gold shoes for the match up. lol Gotta love Jet. 

Truth Is: And, lastly, one of my favorite commercials right now is this M&M ad. Totally makes me laugh every single time. 

Truth Is Thursday--Sinuses Suck

Truth Is: I know I haven’t been blogging much this week.  I’ve been fighting a ferocious sinus infection.  We’re talking the ice bag on face, Anbesol on gums, Advil every chance you get kind of thing. Honestly, I haven’t had one this bad in a long, long time. 

                                                                                                    

Truth Is: If someone cancels a date due to a sinus infection, please know it’s actually in your best interest.  Please don’t respond with the following: “Really?  You’re bailing over a sinus flare up?  If you don’t want to go out with me, just tell me.” 

Here’s the thing:  Unless you would like your date carrying a drippy ice bag, downing Advil, snotting, drooling from a numb mouth thanks to copious amounts of Anbesol, and likely face-planting in her food, be happy about a cancellation.

Truth Is: I’m really looking forward to seeing The Hunger Games, but I would love for people to stop saying it’s the next Harry Potter. No, it isn’t. They’re two completely different stories set in two totally different worlds. Besides, Harry Potter stands alone. 

Truth Is: Tim Tebow is now a Jet, not Bennie (B-B-B-Bennie and the Jets…sorry.  Great song, though).

I’ve heard people say that Tim “needs to change to fit the NFL.  He needs to act more like a football player.” These folks aren’t talking about his game; they’re talking about him as a person.  Ooh, it really boils my blood!

Change to fit in? Well, bah on them!  I say dare to be different.  No one should ever, ever, ever make you feel like you have to fit some absurd standard “they” deem appropriate.

Tim Tebow is a true role model, and if people don’t like it, then maybe that reveals a little something about their true selves. I hope more than anything Tim has the chance to shine in New York. 

Truth Is: My dad is hilarious.  He brought out his fan and there were two big “X’s” drawn in Sharpie marker over two of the buttons.

Me: “Um, Dad?  Why are there two big X’s on your fan?”

Dad: “Because they remind me those two buttons are evil.”

Me: “Evil?”

Dad: “Yeah, well, they screw up my settings, make the thing go WHOOOOOSH, and then it just stops.  Thought it was broken a time or two.  And you know I always end up pushing one of those two stupid buttons.  Not anymore,” he said grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

Classic.

Truth Is Thursday--Rant Time

Truth Is: Yeah, yesterday didn’t happen.  At least, that’s how it felt. It was one of those days where every hour passes by so fast, you think you’re in Doctor Who’s TARDIS. 

Truth Is:  The state of customer service is for crap today, and I’m especially ticked because this circus of elephant crap involves my parents. 

My parents found a spiffy new dishwasher on sale at Best Buy.  Upon purchasing it, BB scheduled a delivery for Tuesday, with installation to occur on Wednesday.  My parents waited around all damn day (from 6:45 a.m., mind you) for nothing.  Never showed. 

Dad called.  Now, it could come Wednesday, and, if not, for sure on Thursday between 8 a.m.-6 p.m. 

Can you guess?  Another no show. 

Dad called and he keeps getting the same response: “I’ll check and get back to you.” Predictably, there’s no “get back to you.”

I’ve had it up to here (indicating over my hair).  It’s not so much the no-shows, but the lack of communication that infuriates me.  Can’t make it?  Call/e-mail/text.  Have to reschedule?  Call/e-mail/text.  It’s really very simple and requires very little effort, and even less time. 

{{{See next Truth Is for the conclusion to this little drama}}}

Truth Is:  Major miscommunication, not a lack of customer service.  Dad gave them two numbers: home (required local number) and cell.  Dad thought they were going to call the cell, but they kept calling the home phone.  Problem?  Mom and Dad keep the ringer off on the home phone, since they mostly use cells. 

So, as Best Buy kept calling the home phone, and Dad kept staring at his non-ringing cell, a big wad of stress built up inside my mom, which, of course, reached me.  And y’all know how I protect my parents, so, naturally I didn’t like anyone messing with them.

The big wad of stress soon turned into an enormous wad of duh when Dad realized what had happened. I can’t even begin to tell you my mom’s reaction. lol

Eventually, everything was sorted and the rep from BB showed up, installed, and even talked a little LSU.  He was a great guy, my parents have a dishwasher, and all is well.  The End...until the next.

Truth Is: BFF got all territorial on me.  He and I were in the middle of a text-fest when, to one of his jokes, I mentioned a guys name.  Enter crickets.  No more texts for a while.  The catch is he should have known EXACTLY what I was talking about—it wasn’t a guy; it was the name of a team mascot.  Later, I get a text asking who this guy is—Dear God Almighty, BFF!  When I texted the obvious answer back, he was all, “ugggggghh.” 

Mom says she’s not sure how he’s going to handle it when I find someone.  And it’s not because he has feelings any deeper than friendship—I think sometimes he’s afraid the friendship will vanish when I find the one, marry, etc.  I’ve seen that happen too much to ever let that happen.  He’s part of my life, always will be. Convincing him of that is a whole other matter.

Truth Is:  I hate the Yoplait swapportunity ad (or however you spell it).  I really just want to take that spoon and smack her on the head.  They need to stop that ad immediately.

Truth Is Tuesday: A Wacky Special Daytona 500 Edition, GO DALE JR.!!!

Truth Is: If you can handle the cuteness…my mom baked a cake for the Daytona 500.  She iced it, putting “Go Dale, #88” on top.  I wanted to take a picture, but she got all Bashful Dwarf on me, saying it wasn’t good enough.  It was so adorable—I told her Dale would probably think that was really nice.

Truth Is:  For the first time, the Daytona 500 was postponed due to rain.  

It should have been a sign. 

Truth Is:  Love the 88 paint job.

Truth Is:  Monday night—Daytona 500 time.  And right off the bat, Jimmie Johnson was in a frightening crash. Y’all, you save the craziness for the end of the race, not the first lap (Jimmie wasn't acting crazy, but others were.  Danica was collected in the mess, too. I was sad for her). 

Truth Is: Jeff Gordon’s engine blew up without any warning whatsoever.  Bizarre, right?  It was about to get more bizarre (bizarrer should totally be a word.  It’s fun to say.  Bizarrer.  Sorry.)

Incredible as it was, Truth Is: Let me just say this as plainly as possible—Car broke.  Driver (Juan Pablo Montoya) lost control.  Driver slams into jet dryer.  BOOM.  Say hello to a huge fury of flames. 

Fortunately, everyone is okay. 

It was UNREAL, though. Seriously, the wackiest thing I’ve ever seen during a race. 

Insert red flag...for a fire delay.  Start waiting game.  Start goofiness.

Truth Is: If they called the race at this point, Dale Jr. would finish 6^th. Whoop!

Truth Is:  Tide apparently cleans tracks.  Seriously—they were bringing out boxes of Tide to clean the track.  It was very Mary Poppins, all of them with their little brooms and stuff.  Betcha the sales for Tide will go up. 

               

Truth Is:  Would you ever think the song All By Myself would be mentioned during the Daytona 500 broadcast?  Yeah, me either.  But it was.  Thanks.  

Truth Is: Commercial—Fox is going to have college football September 1^st.  How many months ’til September?  Oh, right.  Needed a moment to let that resonate.

Truth Is:  They actually started up again at about 12:09 a.m., EST.  And I was every bit as nervous as I was when the dang thing started. So bajiggity. Yeah, I brought out the bajiggity.

Truth Is: The number of commercials during the Daytona 500 is atrocious!  And, then, they promise us side-by-side, but STOP once the race re-starts.  WTH?! 

Truth Is: They must have heard my not-so-silent-plea to bring back the side-by-side during commercials…because they did.  My heart rate thanks you.

Truth Is:  The chunks are rising as I watch the last 15 laps.

Truth Is: Dale has no friends now; Jeff and Jimmie are out, Kasey…just wrecked.  He’s the Lone Ranger, here, folks. Frankly, I like when he controls his own destiny…because good things usually happen.

Truth Is:  Another wreck, and I’m gonna hurl.

Truth Is: DALE JR. FINISHES 2^nd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOO HOO!!!!!!!! No teammate to help, no help from anyone else, and he finished second!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES SIR!!!!

GO DALE!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Truth Is Thursday--Emotional Dweeb, Yoda Dale, & Random Life Stuff

Truth Is:  I read something that suggested meditating on feelings as a way to de-stress.  WTH?  Feelings are the things that send us into orbit!  How the frig can that calm me down? See, a little irked right now…

Truth Is: Dale Jr. ripped it up in the Duels today, finishing second. 

Truth Is: Dale Jr. ripped it up in the Budweiser Shootout, but was unfortunately collected in a foolish wreck.  And, I gotta say, I think Jeff Gordon’s a great driver and all, but he seems to get a little wobbly-kneed when Dale pushes him.  During the shootout, radio communication reports said that Jeff asked Dale to back off.  Thing is, when Dale was pushing him, they were up front.  If the Yoda of restrictor plate racing was on my rear end, I’d let him Jedi my butt all the way around the track, no questions.  If there was ever someone to trust, it’s him.

Truth Is: Very happy that the two-car tandem stuff seems to have diminished at Daytona.  Give me pack racing any day. 

Truth Is:  Dad.  Sigh.  Yeah, he apparently decided to “lightly drizzle” queso (cheese/salsa) on tater tots. 

My response to Dad: “E. R.  I. C. U. Do those letters ring a really loud bell, by chance?” 

Dad, totally playing coy: “Huh, can’t say they do at the moment.”

*Shakes head*

Truth Is: I love my Mavs.  Just had to say that.  They fight so hard.

Truth Is:  Harry Potter better bring home an Academy Award this Sunday.  It will be a travesty in the film world if this series doesn’t have an Oscar to its name. 

Truth Is: Moisturizer update!  The smell—same.  The result—vast improvement already.  I’m shocked.  Obviously, I’ll need to give it more time, but the drastic difference in my skin has me cautiously optimistic that this stuff will abolish the dryness entirely.  

Truth Is:  AMC is showing Sleepless in Seattle later today.  I should have added it to my top five movies.  Anything Tom Hanks & Meg Ryan, I adore, and this is one of my favorites.  Cry every single time.  I know, I'm a romantic dweeb. I accept this.

Truth Is Thursday--Puppies Bark It, Mom Says It, & Whitney Sings It

Truth Is: Little Malachy, the darling, wobbly Pekingese, won Best In Show at Westminster this week.  This was his 115^th best in show title.  He’s such a precious little peanut!

Credit: Craig Ruttle/AP

Truth Is: Me: “Just once, I’d like to be a dog handler at Westminster.”

Mom: “You’d be great.  Animals love you.  But—”

Me: “But what?”

Mom: “Well, you’d look lovely out there…until you trip and face-plant on the carpet in front of the judge.” 

Me: “Great.  Thanks.”

Mom laughs.  I sulk…then laugh at the mental imagery.  

                                                                                                

Truth Is: The weather is seriously screwing with my sinuses.  Can Mother Nature kindly make up her mind on what season this is?

Truth Is: Mom never ceases to amaze me with some of her out-of-the-blue sayings.  The other day, in the middle of conversation, she blurts out, “Oh, holy Jiminy Crickets, I forgot to make my Jell-O.” Holy Jiminy Crickets?! She has never said that a day in her life! LOL  

Truth Is: My Mavs are on a roll!!!!!!! Whoop! Whoop! Love watching them play!

Truth Is:  NASCAR.  Budweiser Shootout.  Saturday night.  I’m so there.  Let’s go 88—rip it up.

Truth Is:  Last weekend, music lost a legend.  Whitney Houston’s voice was a once in a lifetime phenomenon.  I’ll never forget the time my mom, dad, and I went to see her live in concert.  She still had that powerhouse voice and put on quite a show, singing all her classics.  I even remember our section winning the “shoop-shoop” contest.  It was a great night with my family, watching a musical icon.  

She personified talent--no gimmicks, no publicity stunts...just one massively powerful voice.  

Though Whitney’s gone, her music will live on.  I hope she has found peace. 

I remember watching this performance live on MTV with my mom—it was probably my favorite LIVE performance she gave (apart from the National Anthem).  If you haven’t seen it, take a listen when you have a second, and remember her for her God-given talent.  Peace to you, Whitney.

Whitney Houston, Why Does It Hurt So Bad

             

Truth Is Thursday--Voldemort Headaches, Grease, & A Face-Plant

Truth Is:  Thanks to a hellish headache that took over my brain like Voldemort, I’m now backed up on e-mails. 

Truth Is:  I tripped on my computer chord and did a face-plant into my chair (thankfully, it was a soft landing).  It’s one of those things you’re super glad no one witnessed.

Truth Is:  Wish I could charge guys for saying douche-y things. 

Truth Is: Heard You’re The One That I Want from Grease on the radio the other day.  It reminded me of the time some guy said I was too much of a Sandy for him to date.  My comeback at the time was, “Well, Sandy was good enough for John Travolta, but whatever.” 

Today, I’d probably remind him that even Sandy can channel her inner sexy, pull out the black leather and red lipstick, and show that sweet can be sexy, too.  Then, I’d tell him he’s not the one that I want (maybe I’d sing it…maybe not). 

And for the record, he wasn’t a John Travolta. 

Truth Is:  I had more to say, but I’ve plum forgot.

Truth Is Thursday, Pre-Super...huh?

Truth Is: Can’t understand why a company would actually okay a commercial that does nothing but have people screaming.  How can that possibly be effective when it makes viewers say “shut up” and hit mute?  I really question advertising execs sometimes.

Truth Is: Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Part I will be on DVD February 11^th.  I’m buying it.  I like the movies, though they’re not Harry Potter.  I’m not sure it’s entirely healthy to watch it around Vomit Day, but, you know, I’m a risk taker.

Truth Is: Pretty sure I have a demonic paper plate holder.  It’s the only one that holds the paper plate hostage.  When it finally releases the plate, the dang thing flips and sends crumbs all over me and the floor.

Truth Is: I’m really not interested in the Super Bowl this year.  No Cowboys, no Saints, no Texans…blah.  I mean, I’m happy for all fans of the Giants and Patriots—it will be a fantastic day for them. 

Can’t explain this disinterested feeling…Cowboys’ fans knew they wouldn’t make an appearance; we barely had a snowball’s chance in hell of making the playoffs. So, I’m not blah because the Cowboys aren’t in it. 

Maybe it would’ve been cool to see a Harbaugh-Harbaugh showdown or see a new team in there, like the Texans.  Maybe that’s what it is that makes this game so blah to me—there’s no real story to it.  I guess the story for this one would be the Giants/Patriots, Part II or Patriots Seek Redemption, something like that. 

Maybe I’ll get into it once the game starts…that’s probably what will happen.  Maybe.

Anyway, good luck to any and all Pats/Giants fans!  Enjoy it y’all!

Truth Is Thursday--Skin, Single, and Harry Potter

Truth Is: Could someone please tell my skin that you can't decide to be dry and yet still have the nerve to require blot powder by late afternoon?

Truth Is: It seems like everyone is getting married or having babies. A fellow 30-something singleton said everyone around her is getting engaged, married, or pregnant except for her.  I might shouldn't have replied with, "Soon we'll be the only singles in the world."  I meant it as a joke.  By her reaction, I'm not thinking she got the joke part. 

Truth Is: I have to concur with fellow singleton--everyone is getting married and/or pregnant, including one of the most vile excuses for a human being I have ever known, and I don't say that lightly. Seriously, how do women like that get a man to fall in love with them? Because when I say vile, I mean VILE.

Truth Is: I really need to start dating again.  I've been kind-of hibernating this winter.  I blame sports (I mean, really, am I supposed to give up a Saturday night LSU game for a date that has a 50/50 chance of being good? Not on your life.  See, I'm so loyal!). Truth is, I really just don't like dating.  From what I hear, most people don't care for it.  It's just that nine times out of ten, dates are more like bad dreams disguised as hope.

Truth Is:  Really, really sad that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part II did not get nominated for an Oscar for Best Picture, particularly since they could have included another film on the list.  The Harry Potter series has made history; what the series achieved is truly phenomenal, so maybe it doesn't really need an award (but I sure wanted to see them get nominated for the big one--of course, I'm a fan, so...lol). 

Still, I do think it's kind-of a travesty that Alan Rickman did not receive a supporting actor nod for his role as Severus Snape.  He. Brought. Snape. To. Life.  No one could have been Snape, no one.  And his final stand as Snape was exquisite, true perfection (cried my eyes out).  Granted, I have always loved Alan Rickman, but this is one omission I just don't understand.

Deathly Hallows, Part II was nominated for Art Direction, Makeup, and Visual Effects. I hope, hope, hope they walk away with one of these.  It would be the perfect way to close a truly spectacular series.

Truth Is Thursday On Friday: People Shock Me.

Truth Is: Sleepy now...yet not. My eyes must have invisible toothpicks holding them up, while my brain must have found another gear.

Truth Is: The Sandman is clearly playing favorites these days.  I'm not one of them. 

Truth Is:  Couples only parties should be against the law--discrimination against singles or something.

Truth Is: My Mavs won last night.  Very glad about this, since they've lost some serious heart-breakers lately...like at the buzzer. Still, the more games they play, the more formidable they will become.

Truth Is: Dirk Nowitzki became only the 23rd player in NBA history to reach 23,000 career points. I think most people would agree he's one of the best to ever play the game.  Yet, he is likely not going to get his first start in the upcoming All Star Game.  He's currently 3rd behind Blake Griffin and Kevin Durant.  It's a shame because if anyone deserves to start an All Star Game, it's an all star player like Dirk Nowitzki. 

Truth Is: Okay, on behalf of a friend of mine: People, if you don't work hard, you can't expect to have things handed to you simply because you think you deserve it.  There are no shortcuts.  It's called earning it.

Truth Is:  I'm disgusted.  Truly, deeply disgusted.  I get being a fan. I get celebrating a win.  I get friendly competitive conversation--operative word being friendly.  What I don't get is how one fan can treat another fan so appallingly.

After the LSU-Bama Championship game, a 32-year old Bama fan performed lewd acts upon an unconscious LSU fan.  If you really want to know the details, simply visit ESPN or google it, but be prepared for a stomach-turning story.  Oh, and apparently someone caught it all on video, which went viral following the game.  I haven't watched it and will never watch it.  The man has since been arrested. 

There is so much I'd like to say to this guy (sooooo much), but I think I'll just leave it at this: Mike's waiting for you--good luck with that. GEAUX TIGERS!!!!!!!!

Credit: LSU Sports, Steve Franz.

Truth Is Thursday: Utter Confusion & Clarification

Truth Is: I’m still bummed about LSU.

Truth Is: I shouldn’t be bummed—the only game they lost was to Bama (who they already defeated once during the season) in the National Championship.  Otherwise, they had an undefeated regular season and won the SEC Championship.  Clearly, I’m being selfish. 

Truth Is: A** Football Dude was convinced I “wanted” him and now he’s got his boxers in a wad.  Um, I was talking football, and ONLY football.  Please, someone, tell me how football talk translates to “I want you?”

Is there some secret sports code guy talk I’m unaware of? Do words like offense, defense, option, pass, screen, trick play, and quarterback have double secret meanings?

How do things like “Bama is b*&$@-slapping us!” “Lee can throw downfield—put him in, take some shots!” and "That's freaking holding!!!" translate to “Please, take me, I’m yours?!”

And just to clarify, I did not put any spin on how I said anything. I didn’t emphasize certain words or give some stupid sexy wink-eye.  Like I’ve said, when I’m in the game, I’m in the game—flirting is the last thing on my mind…I’m there for my team and that’s it. 

BFF finds me totally hilarious when I watch football, but, then, he’s a fellow football fanatic, so he gets it.  

So, what is it?  Is it so rare to hear a girl talk sports that certain guys think we’re just doing that to impress them, ergo it must be flirting-sex-talk couched in football terms?  I just don’t get it. 

Clarification: The following commercial aired a while back—when my Mom, Dad, and friends first saw it, they laughed and pointed to me saying, “That’s you!”  When you first get to know me, you might think I’m a lot like the first part of the video (the clueless girl).  Then, you learn I’m much more like the second part of the commercial (the, um, sports fan girl).

So, just to clarify, here's an ad that gives you a pretty good idea of how I am when I watch sports. 

Truth Is Thursday!

Truth Is: I don't like when Christmas ends. It's just so depressing. I mean, what do we have to look forward to, holiday-wise?

*New Year's Eve? Eh. A digit changes. Shock. (Okay, okay, so it is kind-of a festive, hope-filled evening. Reckon if I actually had a good NYE, I'd think of it like I do Christmas...but until then, eh). 

*Vomit, er, Valentine's Day? Ooh, yeah, can't wait for the manufactured faux-holiday that tosses singles the middle finger. It's such a Christmas wannabe. Barf.

* St. Patrick's Day? Not bad. I mean, I like luck and four leaf clovers and leprechauns (the cute kind...not the creepy kind). Still, it doesn't have the same magical feeling (could change if leprechauns flew around, sprinkling gold a la the Quidditch World Cup).  ;)

* Easter? Bunnies and baskets and lots of pastel colors and Cadbury Eggs. Ooh, I quite like this one. ;)

So, in conclusion, Cadbury Eggs make all things better. 

Truth Is: One of the best things about the holidays is indulging. Eat without guilt.  Drink soda without guilt. Snack without guilt. Exercise? Nah, not the routine stuff, anyway. I stick with fun, like dancing (believe me, it works you like there's no tomorrow...but it's FUN).

Truth Is: The guilt-free indulging lasts through the Bowl games. Why, you ask? Um, because Mama said so, and you know she's always right. Who am I to question Mom? *sipping Dr. Pepper*

Truth Is: My local Christmas music station stopped playing holiday tunes immediately after Christmas. Now, I know this seems pretty par for the course.  However, in years past they played carols straight through New Year's.  People loved it. 

They didn't this year. Butts.

It's okay, though, because I have my Bing-a-ling White Christmas CD...

...although...

...I have been blasting The Zac Brown Band as well. Love them.

Truth Is: Drum roll, please--During both the Christmas Eve Cowboys' loss and the Christmas Day Mavs' loss, I did NOT swear once, not even a partial swear. So proud. Of course, I did have soda on standby and promptly turned to it whenever I felt the urge to drop a few colorful metaphors.

Truth Is Thursday! Christmas-style!

Truth Is: Twinkle lights hate me. I was trying to string some over the mantle last night and they kept falling off. We're talking Groundhog Day stuff here. Finally did conquer them. *no twinkle lights were harmed in the process*

Truth Is: I'm convinced there are certain people in this world who thrive on drama. Give them a peaceful, stress-free life and they'll be in hell until they can stir up some drama.

Truth Is: I have all my wrapping done...BEFORE Christmas Eve. Just kiss me under the mistletoe and call me Snowy Elf because this is quite an accomplishment for me.

Truth Is: Mom is always saying, "When you bring a hairy leg around..." Yep. Hairy Leg = her way of describing boyfriends. Please, future Man, don't be offended.  Have I mentioned we're a family of characters?

Truth Is: Um, finally told Dad about the broken hose-thing.  He had to try really hard to keep from laughing.

Dad: "Why wouldn't you tell me?"

Me: "Well, after the broken train with oozing battery gunk and the ridiculously loud buzzing broken ornament, I didn't think you'd be too thrilled at a broken vacuum-hose-thing."

Dad, unable to hide the smirk: "Where are the pieces?"

Me: "Follow me. They're just there." I picked them up and coyly held one piece in each hand.

Dad, now fully grinning: "It's fixable. Not a problem. Now, watch here, so you know how to fix it the next time you break it."

Ugh. He knows me so well.

Dad, fixing the hose thing: "It's easy. All you do is screw it in."

Ah. Well. Therein lies the problem. The last thing I would have thought to do was screw it.

I didn't say this out loud.

Truth Is Thursday...On Friday.

Truth Is: Stress was the main ingredient this week. It's like everything lands on your shoulders all at once.

Truth Is: Last weekend was traditional decorating time with the family! I took care of the family room, while Mom was in the kitchen setting up a wrapping station and Dad was hanging stuff around her (like fun Christmas signs and wreaths).  All was fairly quiet, apart from the occasional giggle or Mom telling Dad where to hang stuff.  Next thing I know, both Mom and Dad start singing like two holly jolly reindeer...to Mariah Carey's All I Want For Christmas. We're talking duet.  It was the most adorable thing--I only wish I could have recorded it. 

Truth Is: Fate is trying to put me on Santa's Naughty List indefinitely. You know how I can kind-of, sort-of have a potty mouth while watching sports. Lord help me I try, but when those referees cut loose, so does my mouth.

Christmas Day...the holiest day of the year...and the Dallas Mavericks will play the Miami Heat.  Really? Christmas Day? Really? Have you ANY idea how badly I'm going to have to bite my tongue? Sigh. Having said that, GO MAVS!!!! SO happy to have them back!

Truth Is: Ah, well, while helping my parents decorate I sort-of had one mishap after the other.

1. The little train set that sits by the fireplace EVERY year might be ruined because I forgot to remove the battery. Yeah. When I removed it from the box, a blue goop oozed into my hand.

Brought it to Dad to fix.

Me to Dad: "Bet you never thought you'd still be tinkering with batteries and toys..."

Dad, with a chuckle: "Not at this stage in the game."

Me, a little embarrassed: "Well, it has to be kind-of...refreshing."

Dad began belly laughing.

2. Removed a little musical ornament that plays It's A Small World, pressed the button, and...no song.  But, I did get an incredibly loud, non-stop buzzing sound.

Brought it to Dad to fix.

Me: "Um, it won't stop buzzing."

Dad just looked at me. He was still working on trying to get the battery out of the train. Mom eventually shoved something up under the bottom of it and stopped the thing from making any sound...possibly forever.

3. While trying to vacuum the area around the tree, the hose thing detached from the suck-part thing...as in, it broke. Um, I hid it.  Dad doesn't know yet. Thank God they have two.

Well, my eyes are beginning to glaze over--I'll catch up on blog reading over the weekend. I apologize if there are any mistakes in this post, but I'm seriously zombie-like...even though I really do hate zombies.

Oh, and I'll post the Christmas fun facts tomorrow. :)