Male Monogamists--An Urban Man Myth?

Behold an example of the rare, nearly extinct species called Male Monogamists. 

Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter fame (and The Woman In Black) recently stated that he is a serial monogamist.  And, yes, he is happily in love.

The man is only 22 years old.  TWENTY-TWO, thinking the way a thirty or forty-year-old man should think.

Perhaps Dan should hold a seminar and relay this notion of monogamy to older men, since the concept seems lost on many of them (not all, mind you, but, dang, there are quite a few who just can’t seem to stay with one woman).  

Dan also mentioned an incident where some woman implicitly invited him to have sex with her, even going so far as providing him with her hotel number.  Ugh.  Self-respect, ladies! Self-respect!    

I suppose Male Monogamists do, indeed, exist, though I'm convinced they are an endangered species.

Then, awwww:

Credit: Getty Images

Now, Mr. Harry Handsome:

Credit: Esquire

The Urban Love Myth

The Urban Love Myth

Tell Bridget Jones, call Carrie Bradshaw, channel Jane Austen, and alert the white jackets. And someone, please, slap me silly because I have done something beyond comprehension. 

The thing with which I must hide my head in shame: While watching the wedding scene of The Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn, Part I…I cried. We’re talking the salty tears, snotty nose variety, here, folks.  And I was really pathetic when they started playing Flightless Bird, American Mouth…yeah, hello, Kleenex. 

My mind, which was thoroughly repulsed, screamed, “You don’t cry at Twilight!” (totally modified that from Tom Hanks circa A League of Their Own).

It was a totally impulsive, unfiltered reaction, and I couldn’t help but wonder why.  Then, it hit me: the reason my tears flowed wasn’t for the vampire and his flightless bird, it was because I envied the love they shared, and, more importantly, I wondered about its existence in reality.

And, yes, I know it’s a movie, a book, fake, so not the real world, blah, blah, blah.  I get that; I’m not delusional.  But…in all honesty, shouldn’t that supposed unrealistic love be part of our world? I mean, minus the bloodsucking, bruising, and rapidly growing baby, followed by gruesome birth stuff. 

So, the trillion dollar question:  Does that kind of inconvenient, heart-stopping, endless love actually exist in our reality?  If we’re patient, and look with our hearts, yes, I believe it does.   

I could easily say it doesn’t exist.  Why?  Because it’s the easy answer.  It’s an easy way to explain away the frustration, the perpetual Singletonville address, and, in some cases, settling with someone you know isn’t right for you. 

See, I think many people today are so jaded that, on some level, they settle for what’s easy or convenient because they figure they’ll never find the real thing.  I’ve known people who have married because they believed that person was the best they could do at the time.  Then, of course, you have the men who marry based on lust, women who marry for money, etc.  None of these scenarios equal the kind of love I’m talking about—the kind of love we all yearn for…and we all deserve.  

People are so quick to say true love is only for books and movies.  But, I don’t think that’s true.  The only reason we don’t see it in everyday life is because no one steps up and actually makes it happen. 

If everyone settles or rushes into something “just because,” then, naturally, the concept of a soul mate becomes more of an urban love myth than an actuality.  No wonder so many people don’t believe movie-love exists—they’re all too busy crapping on the idea.

Maybe if we trusted our hearts a little more, gave credit to our instincts, and took chances, we’d look at the world and it would remind us of An Affair to Remember or a Jane Austen novel, rather than just leaving us wishing for some elusive dream. 

I’m pretty sure some people think I’m a fool, waiting for something I may never find.  Maybe I am.  But, I’d rather be a believing fool, than alone in a relationship, wishing I had trusted in something that’s seemingly unbelievable. 

There are many different kinds of love, bringing people together, making us happy.  So, why sell one brand of love short?  If love really does make the world go round, then giving up on any part of it is like helping to end the world (in a manner of dramatic speaking).

Maybe never giving up isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

And so ends this episode of Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, otherwise known as my single gal brain dump. 

**This was a guest post I wrote for the wonderful Janie Junebug. She mentioned posting it here as well, but in my sleep deprived state, I plum forgot. 

Truth Is Thursday: Single Gal Mind Dump and M&M's

Truth Is: What’s up with the wedding marathons on television?  Seriously.  Channels like Hallmark and Lifetime and, I don’t know, others, have had wedding weekends since January. 

Pretty sure one of them begged viewers to celebrate “Wedding Month.” Huh, what, and more huh?  June is the official wedding month.  Not January, not February (apart from V-Day, which is like engagement day), not March, April, or May—June, and ONLY June. 

And I know this isn’t just annoying to me as a single because even my mom said it was ridiculously obnoxious.  Now, when my fairytale-happy, loves-to-watch-happy, happy, joy, joy-movies mom says as much, you know it must be white-dress and butter cream icing overkill.

Sorry.  Had to just, you know, get that off my mind because…

Truth Is: …my brain is standing room only.  I’m surprised I don’t have to WD-40 the dang thing.  It’s just going and going and going and going. It won’t shut the heck up and let me be, much less sleep.  

Truth Is:  Kind of getting sick of the: “You’ll need x-y-z when you have kids one day…if you have them, I mean.”  Oh, the “Your clock must be ticking about now, right?” is always pleasant.  And let’s not forget the classically annoying, “Well, you’ll probably find him someday.”

Anyone have ANY suggestions for how to respond to those statements?  I'm getting tired of responding with the plastered smile and resigned nod.  I don’t think they’re trying to be mean or anything—it’s more like they forgot about their stay in Singletonville.

These same women HATED when the Marrieds made those kinds of statements/questions.  Yet, here they are, cuddling up to the ideology they once loathed, while busily inserting it in my life. 

I sometimes wonder if marriage acts as a partial lobotomy on the single gal mindset for some women.  

Truth Is: My Mavs play the Heat tonight. *Hurl* If we hadn't annihilated them in the Championship last year *bliss*, I'd be much more nervous.  Jason Terry is rumored to be breaking out the gold shoes for the match up. lol Gotta love Jet. 

Truth Is: And, lastly, one of my favorite commercials right now is this M&M ad. Totally makes me laugh every single time. 

Getting To Know You Tag

I received this tag from the wonderful, inspiring Barsola.  If you haven't visited her blog, please do so--she is quite an inspiration, and I just think the world of her.

If you would like to play along, please take these questions and have fun--would love to read everyone's answers. 

How big is your fabric stash? (i.e., how many boxes, bins or pounds? You determine the measurement)

Yeah, I’m not a fabric-y kind of person, really.  I do have a small container of ribbons I like to use on presents.  May not be able to wrap very well, but I can tie a mean bow.  Hey, it’s something anyway.

Are you an early bird or night owl?

Oh, I fly with the owls.  The “early bird gets the worm” never appealed to me.  Maybe it’s the worm thing. Ew.

Do you speak any other languages? If not what other language do you wish you knew?

I’m pretty good with French, but I would love to speak so many languages, like Mandarin and Spanish. 

 
What store do you have a hard time leaving empty-handed (online or bricks and sticks)?

If I had to pick one, I’d say Sephora.  I love that place—all your favorite beauty products in one stop…can we say dream?!  And they accept returns.  *squeal* It’s not just make-up, either—you have skin care, hair care, bath & body products…oooh, it’s so much fun, and I always find something to try out. 

What are your favorite blogs to read?

Everyone that I have met on here is so special and unique and wonderful that I couldn’t possibly name favorites because I love them all.

What is your favorite book or movie?

Again, so many.  Harry Potter, to me, is just perfection for all ages, both book and film.  

Where do you sew?

I don’t sew.  I tried...it didn't end well.  Wish I really knew how to sew, but I don’t.  Maybe one day. 

When did you make your first quilt?

I’ve never made one, but I’ve always loved them. When I think of a quilt, I think, “Made with Love.”

How many hours per week (per day?) do you spend on Pinterest? What, if anything have you made/acquired/acted on that you pinned?

I literally just heard about Pinterest, but I know nothing about it.

What’s your favorite quilting tip?

Since I don’t quilt myself, the only tip I can give is to cherish those that are made for you or those you find, knowing each stitch is made with love. Quilts, to me, tell a story--one you can't see, but one you can feel. 

Did you make a New Years resolution? Have you kept it?

I try not to make resolutions, but instead create a new or modified set of goals.  Resolutions never work. They just don’t.

For example, “I resolve to not drink soda.” For a while, this resolution works, until said resolution sucks so bad you break it.  Then, you realize resolutions as a whole just plain suck, are a complete waste of time, and end up making you feel bad about yourself when you break them. 

So, yeah, goals are a much better way to go—like, I will slowly begin cutting back on soda, until I’m only drinking it during, say, an LSU game (which is just so necessary…I would be frightened to see myself sans soda during an LSU game *shivers*).  See? Much more manageable, minus the suck and guilt parts.

***** 

With my sinuses finally easing up, I was able to thoroughly enjoy the NASCAR race yesterday...until rain caused an abrupt ending. Sigh. BUT...Dale finished 3rd!!! He was methodically ripping it up all race long. Another amazing finish for the 88, lifting him to 3rd in Sprint Cup Standings. 

 

Eleven, Part Three

Okay, here's the final set of questions, this time from Catherine. I wanted to keep her questions in the original colors she selected for them. 

Catherine's Questions:

1. What is your biggest fear and why?

                                              

Not having my parents with me one day.  I know it’s the way life goes, but I can’t even think about it, to be honest.  We are so close—our family is small, but good (Lilo & Stitch reference there). 

Really can’t think about any of this…so…moving on…

2. What are your plans for the future?

“Plan” is a four-letter word in my world.  Every single solitary time I use that word, everything falls magnificently to pieces.  So, I try not to “plan” anything.  I just set goals, hold tight to dreams, and try my best.

3. Do you prefer a nice stomach or a nice butt on the opposite sex?

Hmm. Reckon I’d go with stomach.  Truthfully, I really love strong arms and big hands.

4. What are your opinions on gay marriage?

I’m a hopeless romantic, so maybe this is going to sound embarrassingly simple-minded, but here it goes:  Love is about two people, two hearts, two souls, united as one.  Marriage is supposed to be about two people in love who want to spend the rest of their lives together.   When it comes down to it, shouldn’t it be all about love?  And when you look around this big old world, I reckon it could use a little more love.

5. What do you think about Rebecca Black?

*Crickets* I don’t know who she is.

6. How many pairs of heels do you own?

Ha!  A few, but I'm more of a sneaker/boot/espadrille girl. 

7. Share the experience of your first kiss.

It was awkward, but sweet.  He was older than me and had more experience than I had, which made me crazy nervous.  What’s funny is that he was as anxious as I was nervous because he really liked me, and I, apparently, “intimidated” him, which was just completely weird to me since I’m so not intimidating.

Anyway, when he finally made his move, he asked, “May I?” I actually really liked that.  The kiss was gentle, sweet, and, um, I drove him crazy (he told me as much). It was nice to know the kissing thing came naturally.  Gives me a bit of confidence that other things will just come naturally as well. ;)

8. List 3 things you like about yourself, and 3 things you don't like.

Like: 1. If I could, I’d be a real life Santa, just so I could see people happy and help them see that dreams do come true; 2. My night owl ways; 3.My inner strength.

Dislike: 1. I can be really tough on myself, particularly with work and goals—it’s part of that perfectionist thing; 2. I hate that I allow doubt to creep into my mind from time to time; 3. My long-term relationship with stress.

9. What is the worst pickup line you've ever heard? (check out my last post titled - Pickup lines at their worst, for ideas if your stuck)

“Your lips look like pillows…I’d love to lay one on them.”

10. How many hours a day or week do you spend blogging?

I’m not sure, actually—yeah, that’s a boring non-answer.

11. Would you rather have eternal health, wealth or love? Explain.

Love.  Eternal wealth is intangible and cold.  Eternal health means nothing without love.  Love makes the world go ‘round.

As for my tags, I decided to pick seven fellow bloggers, but feel free to snatch these questions up and have fun, if you feel like it:

1.  J. Day
2. Ms. Caboo
3. Anna
4. Hazel
5. PurpleMist
6. Yvonne
7. Janie Junebug

My Questions (I’m going with whimsy, here):

1. If you could have the choice of one superpower, what would it be and why?
2. Which Harry Potter movie is your favorite?  Why?
3. Which Harry Potter book is your favorite?  Why?
4. Do you believe in parallel universes? Why or why not?
5. Do you think aliens exist?  If so, are they E.T. kind or Independence Day mean?
6. What’s the first thought that jumps into your mind when you see the word Disney?
7. Assuming it’s true, and we only know about 10-15% of the ocean’s inhabitants, what do you hope is down there that we have yet to find?
8. What is your favorite movie score?
9. If you found yourself living with seven tiny men, what would their names be?
10.  A big blue genie grants you one particular wish: Change the world into any imaginary world you’ve either read in a book or seen in a film.  Which world would you choose and why?
11. If you could pick one literary or film character and bring him to life to be your soul mate, who would it be and why?

Eleven, Part Two

Today, we have questions from my dear friend Jewels, along with a few more random facts. I knew Jewels would have some awesome questions--she didn't disappoint.

Jewels' Questions:

1. What side of the bed do you sleep on? 

Middle. Yep, I’m that single.

2. Do you believe in ghosts? 

Absolutely, no question. 

3. Would you be willing to go on a cross country (driving) trip with me? 

As willing as I’d be to accept an invite to a Mavs game or NASCAR race. (Translation: Absolutely.)

4. If you could only watch one show for the rest of your life what would it be?

Wow.  Tough.  Friends, I think.  Laughing is what it's all about.

5. If you could only read one author until the end of time who would it be?  

J.K Rowling.  I love her writing style.  Her words move like movies in your mind.  Can’t wait for her upcoming novel for adults!

6. If you HAD to get something pierced what would it be?

I have my ears pierced, so I guess I’d get ‘em done again.  

7. Given a choice of a mystery meaning Chinese symbol, butterfly, or zodiac tattoo which would you pick? (You HAVE to pick one)

Butterfly. I love butterflies.

8. Would you rather have sex with Wilford Brimley/Susan Boyle or give up sex for good?

Well, since this is so not applicable to me, I think it’s safe to say I’d stay the course—no sex.

9. What would you pay for a vaccination that prevents kids from being bitchy, sassy, dickheads?

LOL--So long as there aren't any dangerous side effects...or, you know, so long as it doesn't turn them into zombies *shivers*...I reckon I'd cough up a good amount of dough to ensure we don't release any more asshats into society. 

10. Would you rather serve a week in prison or try and survive for a year alone in a jungle?

I’m going to the jungle--swing on a vine, sing a little Phil Collins, and hope for a half-naked Tarzan.

11. What is it about nice people that attract total idiots?

Would LOVE to crystal ball this answer somehow—in other words, not a friggin clue.  

Random facts: 

6) I keep a box of Lucky Charms in the pantry at all times because it reminds me of my childhood.

                                                                                             
7)  I love watching Murder She Wrote.  Stop laughing.  It has always been a Mom & me kind of show, along with Love Boat and Little House on the Prairie.   Really, stop laughing. ;)

8)   Top Gun is supposed to be a manly-man’s movie, right?  I respectfully and hormonally disagree.  Let’s see: Fighter jets, sexy men in bum-hugging uniforms, and, hello, volleyball scene.  Yeah, it’s eye-candy for women.  "Maverick, you big stud..."

Credit: Paramount Pictures Promotional Images

Tomorrow we have questions from Catherine!

Eleven, Part One

Since there a few of these to do, I thought it would be better to split them up over a few days. Otherwise, this would be a very loooooong post. ;) 

The Rules

1) Post these rules.  
2) Post 11 random things about yourself. (I'm splitting these up over several posts).
3) Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post. (Again, split up)
4) Create 11 new questions for the people you tag to answer. (Will do in the last post)
5) Go to their blog and tell them they've been tagged.
6) No cop-outs in the tagging section like “if you are reading this/follow me,” blah blah blah. you have to legitimately tag people. (Last post, again)

So, today, we have Jay's Questions. 

Jay's Questions:

1) Do you like staying in hotels?                

Yes, but not the creepy ones with doors on the outside, facing the street.  Yeah, I saw Psycho.  Never.  Again.

2) Beach or swimming pool?

Beach.  I love standing in front of the ocean and feeling so tiny, like a little action figure.  The sound of the sea is like a lullaby. Plus, sand is a great natural exfoliant.

3) Which movie can you watch over and over and over again? 

Honestly, probably too many to count.  Right now, it’s been Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part II.  I just think it’s an exquisite film.

4) Why do people do these tags?

They’re fun and really good for a brain that just refuses to think on its own.

5) Have you ever seen an eclipse? 

Not really sure.  I vaguely remember seeing one, I think, but that could have been a dream or something.  I do remember seeing comets.  Awesome.

 
6) What is your favorite word? 

Christmas—it encompasses everything: love, family, tradition, hope, miracles, and the list goes on. It’s just such a happy word. :)

7) What is your least favorite word?

It’s more like a category—cruel, hurtful words, across the board.

8) What sound or noise do you love?

My mom and dad laughing—cutest thing ever.

The LSU Tiger Marching Band would be a very close second. The Golden Band from Tigerland. :)

9) What sound or noise do you hate? 

Nails on a chalkboard.

10) What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?

Sideline reporter for ESPN or Fox Sports…or an imagineer for Disney.

11) What is your favorite curse word?

Sh*&  It just sums things up so nicely. 

Random facts: (Part one)

1) I can drink apple cider vinegar straight.

                                                                                
2) Favorite salad dressing is my papaw’s garlic vinegar dressing (my mom makes it now—it’s so yum).  Would not recommend prior to a date. 

3) I don’t like wind storms.  They make the trees crackle and the house makes shifty, popping sounds...oh, and the branches slam onto the roof.  Scary stuff.

4) Absolutely loathe drying my hair right after I get out of the shower.  It takes so long!  So, I try to let it air dry as much as possible.

5)  When I was little, I used to think I could fly. 

Tomorrow, we'll have questions from the wonderful Jewels!

The Fab Fives!

Once again, Jay has come up with a super fun tag for us!  It's called the fab five.  All you have to do is name your favorite top fives in each category.  I'm pretty sure I've missed favorites that should be in my fab fives. lol

Anyway, here are my fab fives, in no particular order!

Actors

1) Tom Hanks

2) Johnny Depp

3) Colin Firth

4) Gary Oldman

5a) Harrison Ford

5b) Alan Rickman (okay, so I added one)

 

Actresses

1) Kate Winslet

2) Meryl Streep

3) Meg Ryan

4) Anne Hathaway

5) Sandra Bullock

Movies (so impossible)

1) Beauty and the Beast

2) The Harry Potter Films (specifically, Sorcerer’s Stone, Prisoner of Azkaban, Goblet of Fire, and Deathly Hallows, Part II)

3) Titanic

4) Gone With the Wind

5a) Miracle on 34^th Street (original)

5b) White Christmas 

Books (more impossible)

1) Harry Potter (all)

2) Bridget Jones’s Diary

3) Pride & Prejudice

4) The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe

5) Charlotte’s Web

Moments that inspire me

1) The ocean

2) Shooting stars

3) Sunrise/Sunset

4) Characters that jump off the page

5) Heroism and bravery…having courage.

 Places to go (in a city)

1) Local, family owned bookstores/businesses, as well as Barnes & Noble, basically any bookstore lol

2) Passionate sporting venues (like Cowboys Stadium, American Airlines Center for the Mavs, LSU, race tracks for NASCAR, or Yankee Stadium, etc.)

3) Anywhere there’s food, whether it’s BBQ, corndogs, or Tex-Mex

4) Famous landmarks or places of historical significance

5) Museums

Places to go in the world (that you’ve been to)

1) Disneyland

2) Williamsburg, Virginia

3) Melbourne, Australia

4) New Zealand

5) Big Sur, California

Best live shows you’ve seen

1) Carole King (my first real concert when I was little)

2) Janet Jackson (for her Janet. album)

3) Paula Abdul (yep, back in the early 90s, and it was awesome)

4) Whitney Houston

5) The Sleeping Beauty, New York City Ballet

People I could do without

1) Mean, cruel folks

2) Those with grossly inflated egos.

3) People who think THEY know how best YOU should live YOUR life

4) Those lacking accountability

5) Plastic people

If you would like to participate in the fab fives, please have fun and go for it! Can’t wait to read your fab fives!

Smelly Cat

Because my skin has decided to respond to the hard water and dry air by becoming the Sahara Desert, I’ve been forced to find a new super-duper moisturizer. 

I finally found one with rave reviews, 5 out of 5 stars.  Yeah, ordered that immediately.  Once it arrived, I ripped that stuff open and slathered it on my parched skin, which soaked it up like a sponge. 

All was well. 

Until…sniff.  Sniff.  Sniff. 

Aw, hell.  I smell like my dentist’s office.

Don’t get me wrong, it smells wonderful, but…it smells like my dentist’s office. 

This is a problem. 

I have this sometimes irrational fear of smells, namely those of doctor’s offices, hospitals, and dentist’s offices.   Hell, even the doctors themselves carry a foreboding scent.  Seriously, I’ve gagged when a doctor leaned in to look in my ear.

I’m thinking dating a doctor could be problematic?  Just a hunch.  

When we almost lost my dad, we spent a lot of time in the hospital.  Just to get past my stupid smell fears, I found myself literally HAVING to go to my one, lone refuge in the hospital—the one place I could find solace and peace: The gift shop. 

Plus, it was the one place that didn’t stink. 

Oh, Dad, you’re out of snacks.  I’ll just pop down to the gift shop.

Dad, you need some toothpaste!  Gift shop!

What did you say? You want some more mints?  Gift shop!

Of course, I think a large part of it was that I wanted to get my dad tons of goodies to make him happy while he recovered.  Heck, the day he was moved from the ER, I got him a teddy bear to keep him company. 

I honestly didn’t realize just how important the gift shop was during that time.  I’m pretty sure it was the only thing that kept me sane and made me feel like I was doing something to make my dad smile. 

Anyway, I’ve developed this scent association…with my moisturizer…and the dentist.  It made me gag.  So, now I have this scary-doctor-smell on my skin…and no gift shop.

Most people would think it smells wonderful. 

To me, I’m smelly cat.  Actually, I’m smelly cat with a gagging problem.

If the stuff doesn’t work PERFECTLY, then I’ll happily return it. Bye-bye smelly cat.

If, however, it works, then I guess I’ll be gagging my way to sweet skin.

Monday Music & Total Randomness

It's time for a mind dump Monday!  (I apologize in advance)

*  Congrats to the Giants & their fans! The Manning family DNA might as well be designated "superhero-esque." No one can say Eli isn't as good as Tom Brady now, and I'm happy for him--imagine having to live in the shadow of Peyton Manning? I mean, that's an impressively intimidating shadow!  Think Eli is creating his own shadow now. ;)

*  I thought Madonna put on an awesome halftime show. People are sooooo quick to point out her near-fall, some awkward dancing, and her lip-syncing, but, dang, she IS 53 years young, folks! Stop the nitpicking.  She looked fantastic and gave fans their money's worth.  Frankly, like my mom said, it was one of the best halftime shows we've had in a long time.

* Okay, I'm about to have a real stupid fan-girl moment (you've been forewarned).  NASCAR is about to start! *SQUEAL*  The sound of roaring engines, lug nuts flying around, tires, track suits, spiffy painted cars, the Boogity, boogity, boogity, let's go racin' boys...sigh.   So. Excited.  GO DALE!!!!!!!  Okay, end of fan-girl moment.

* Pretty sure I have Super Bowl coma because today doesn't even feel like a weekday...at all--more like Sunday, Part II.

This song ALWAYS brightens my day--I just think it's so sexy and fun.  So, turn up the volume and feel the relaxation wash over you.  (Sorry if there's an ad before the video).

Maroon 5, Sunday Morning. 

Defining Insanity

These things are completely insane in different ways:

• Staying up all night and well into the next morning to watch the men’s tennis final at the Australian Open.  (in an epic way)

• Two men playing tennis for nearly six solid hours…and both are still able to stand when it’s over. (in a superhero way)

• Um, even without sleep, I was still totally able to cheer on my Mavs with gusto.  I inherited my mom’s night owl gene big time. (in an awesome way)

• Shaun White. (in a really good way)  

• Sinus attacks. (in a really bad way)

• Wind that sounds like it’s coming through the windows. (in a freaky way)

• How my mom can totally read my mind. (in a groovy-Sookie Stackhouse way)

• The man who wants happily ever after, but doesn’t want to put the effort into finding it and expects it to just fall in his lap. (in a sad way)

• The woman who believes sex will lure a husband away from his wife.  No joke. (in a completely pathetic way)

• Mother Nature. (in a scary way)

Unexpected Insanity: While watching the marathon tennis showdown, I began noticing things that I never noticed during the average length match.  Thus, I had some unusual observations, due in large part to sleep deprivation. 

• Nadal’s butt-hugger shorts gave him loads of wedgies. 

• The ball chasers had to maintain a specific crouching position which might have been unfortunate if they had developed gas.

• The towel holders had to have felt ewy.  After nearly six hours of wiping sweat, spit, and possibly nose drips, imagine how germy and stinky those towels must have been…and they had to touch them.  Maybe they changed towels, but they looked the same.  Either way…ick.

Bridget Jones, You Disappoint Me.

Bridget Jones, friend and mascot to all single, thirty-something women around the globe, has just made me want to chuck eggs at my television.

On a particularly drab Sunday, boredom struck at approximately 2:17 a.m. When boredom hits a sometimes insomniac, certain things that one would find exceedingly dull become the most interesting things in the world, like infomercials or, in this case, special features on The Edge of Reason DVD.  

Under the special features, there was a "Who's Your Man" quiz.  All I have to do is answer a series of questions and it will choose a man that is right for me.  At the end of the quiz, it will evaluate my answers and show me who my perfect partner is: Mark Darcy or Daniel Cleaver.

If I get Daniel, I should just hang up underwear and call it a day, I thought to myself.

Here is a sampling of the questions and answers I selected:

What is your idea of a perfect kiss?  So, it's going to be either sweet, tender, with a bit of tongue or passionate, purposeful, all tongue.  Well, ideally you want the sweet to end up at the passionate, so both...but I can't choose both.  Dilemma.  I guess if we're talking for starters, I'd go with the sweet, tender, bit o' tongue.

You've just seen an unfaithful ex after a long time.  How do you react?  Easy, I remember how miserable he made me feel. 

How do men in tuxedos make you feel? Um, hot under the collar, for sure. James Bond, anyone?

After more questions like the above, it was finally time to find out who my perfect man will be! Terribly exciting for a boring night!

Daniel ding-dong, but v. bad:

Credit: Universal Studios Publicity Photos

Or Mark, double ding-dong and v. good:

Credit: Universal Studios Publicity Photos

Mark or Daniel...Mark or Daniel...who will it be?

Ah, here comes my ideal mate!!!

*Screen Flash*

Neither Mark nor Daniel is right for you.

WHAT?! NEITHER?! THAT WASN'T AN OPTION WHEN I STARTED THIS DANG QUIZ!!!!

You are too carefree and cool to let any man tie you down.  You are enjoying being single on your terms.  The chase and being in control are what turn you on. You're not ready to fall in love, settle down, and have babies--there are just too many men and not enough time.

HUH?! Apart from being single on my terms, I must wholly disagree with its entire evaluation.

This is where boredom turned into determination: I retook the quiz...several times...until I got an actual man. Pathetic, I know, but I suddenly thought I might jinx myself if I accepted "neither" as my answer.

Finally, I got a man:

Credit: Universal Studios Publicity Photos

Mark Darcy: You are a Mark girl.  You're looking for a man who accepts you for what you are and loves your wobbly bits.  Mark is that sort of man: kind, considerate, coy, stable, and sweet. Men like Mark are gentlemen through and through and beneath that conservative exterior beats a heart of gold, which needs a woman like you to keep it pumping.

Ah, much better. Perfectly on point. I approve. See, it got me absolutely right! *we won't mention its initially incorrect assessment or the subsequent tries it took for the dang thing to finally give me a man*

Lessons Learned

First of all, has anyone had trouble signing into Blogger? Dang!

I have so much blog reading and writing to catch up on--having trouble signing in doesn't help. :(

Lessons Learned:

1. Stress, migraine, and cramps really don't mix well.

2. I'm thinking I should not be so emotionally involved in sports.  I really do get "into" the game. Last night, the LSU Tigers ended an absolutely phenomenal season (undefeated, SEC Champs) with one of the most bizarre offensive performances I've ever seen in football.  

MUCH love to the LSU Defense--y'all played to win. But the offensive strategy was like they were hoping to win, not playing to win. Why else would you keep an ineffective QB in the game with a Championship on the line? Would you not try something different?! How about putting the QB that got you where you are in the game?!

See, I get a wee bit emotional.  I'm going to try to calm it down and not get so involved. Why? Because maybe then I won't take losses so hard, won't get all stressed, and won't get queasy stomach. 

3. When a guy who can't get what he wants from you offers his support prior to said game, don't blindly believe he will actually end the evening being a good-sports-guy-friend. No, because so long as his perky controls his thinking, he will turn into an absolute a**. 

Um, and just for the record, LSU finished #2...where, Mr. A**, did your team finish? Oh, right, sorry about that. (Dang, I wish I had said that to him, but I'm a better sport).

Superhero Me!

So, here we go! Lex has given us a challenge: to create, write, and draw a superhero version of ourselves. Using your super power suggestions, I crafted my superhero self! And, um, after the Cowboys’ unbelievable loss (our coach basically iced our own kicker…and it worked.), I had to work out the tension and got a little carried away with this superhero challenge. *blushes* 

The Frisky Virgin, superhero-style

Code Name: The Frisky Virgin

Description: From the deepest, darkest corners of night to the blindingly bright rays of day, she moves, unnoticed by human eyes, watching, listening, and waiting. Delusional dizziness is doomed! Ignorance be gone! Douche-bags beware! Liar-liar pants on fire she shall declare!

Super Powers:

• The brutal truth she speaks will penetrate your brain and replace the stupid with common sense and accountability. (Might have been useful for the Cowboys coach yesterday…icing your own kicker…just when you think you’ve seen it all).

• Can move about unnoticed, completely invisible to human eyes (yeah, this is so a real power of mine)

• Her palms mysteriously soaked the power of the Patronus and Petrificus Totalus charms from the pages of Harry Potter.  Together, they bind wrongdoers in an impenetrable web of freezing light and wispy blue jays (TFV’s Patronus). (Dang, I wish!)

• By virtue of her own virtue, TFV is able to save women from giving it up to a lying douche-bag (and vice versa—save men from falling for a vicious, ill-intentioned, sight-setting, money-grubbing witch…’cause those do exist and they always seem to win…not anymore!).  (Kinda want a theme song now).

• Irresistible to men when she chooses to be visible. (*snort* wish this were true).

Bonus abilities: Fly, super speed, and super strength. (really, who doesn’t want these?)

Tools:

*Bejeweled “V” on her belt: glows and vibrates [hey, if phones can be set to vibrate, so can my bejeweled“V”] to alert her of someone needing assistance; can also detach and be used as a smart-weapon (really, couldn’t this be some character on True Blood, minus the obvious cheesy bits?) 

Thank you, Lex! This was so much fun!!!

Lion King Cuteness, Blog Award, & Kiss It.

Kiss It: We have some randomness this Friday, mainly because my brain has declared an early weekend due to its state of pi** off.  A certain HE made a cameo and proceeded to, yet again, show just how incredibly screwed up he is about things, namely how to treat others. The funny thing is, I'm not convinced he even gets what he does or says. I'm not mad or hurt on a personal level, just ticked on a human-to-human level. There's a way of treating people, you know, and it doesn't involve impersonating the Riddler.  I know this is all cryptic, but, like I said, the brain has left its pink slip for the day. 

Lion King Cuteness: Mom told me Dad asked her if they had the DVD The Lion King.  She didn't think they had it, so Dad hopped on over to Target and came home with the DVD. 

Once home, Mom told me she had to ask him about his interest in the DVD:

Mom: "Honey, why did you get The Lion King?"

Dad, a little coy: "'Cause I like the music."

Isn't that cute? This is a man who likes war movies, action films, and comedy-type things, like Wedding Crashers and Stripes, yet here he is buying a Disney movie. Too darn cute.

Blog Award: I received a wonderful award from the super adorably kind Purple.Mist! Thank you so much, sweetie, and huge congrats on finishing your exams!!!

Now, I'm supposed to pass this pretty award to 15 bloggers, but you know I'm ridiculously bad about that.   So, with it being the holidays and all, EVERYONE snatch it up and enjoy.

Extra Random Fun: Here's what y'all have suggested so far for my superhero alter ego super powers...

With invisibility already in check...

Lost.In.Idaho: Super honesty (no sugar coating--brutal bluntness only).

J.Day: Knock sense into people (I'm thinking this could work with the super honesty--like the result of brutal bluntness is common sense.)

LOLA: Harry & Hermione powers. (So, here, I'm thinking about taking Expecto Patronum and Petrificus Totalus and combining them into one super spell).

Loving your suggestions!!!  If y'all have any others, bring 'em on!!!

So, this weekend, aside from sweating over sports, I'll be working up my superhero identity--very fun. Great idea, Lex!!!

Have a great weekend!!!

007 Daniel Craig Doesn't Mince Words

Photo Sony Pictures

Last night, I came across an article where Daniel Craig (00-sexy, uh, 7) unleashed on the Kardashian bunch. 


Here's part of what he had to say in an interview with GQ magazine:

"It's a career. What can I tell you?" he said. "It is a career; I'm not being cynical. And why wouldn't you? Look at the Kardashians, they're worth millions. Millions! I don't think they were that badly off to begin with, but now look at them. You see that and you think, 'What, you mean all I have to do is behave like a f*!$ing idiot on television and then you'll pay me millions?'"

Now, I don't begrudge anybody anything, but I just don't understand the Kardashians.  The first time I heard of Kim Kardashian was when her sex tape made the news. As for her sisters, I only heard of them when one married a basketball player and the other became pregnant with her boyfriend's baby. I didn't even know they had a brother until I saw a commercial for the most recent season of Dancing With The Stars. 

Craig is right about how one can make millions on television today, but it's not limited to the Kardashians.  When I look at the types of shows proffered for our entertainment, most of what I see involves bad behavior and/or exploitation. 

You have drunken messes, swearing rants, cruelty, extravagant snobs, delusional egos, and promiscuity, while the unique, different, or hurting are portrayed in a supposed positive light, when really it's just a subtle way of making fun.

What's happened? Since when did severely bad behavior become the jewel in the crown? To me, when you reward bad behavior, you encourage it. Stop rewarding it, and you send a much stronger message about right and wrong and basic human decency. 

Bottom Line: I don't get it. Oh, I get the whole money aspect, but...I don't get it. Who would want to act the way some of these people act? Who would want to treat others so poorly? And why? I don't get it. I really just don't get it. And, apparently, neither does 007.

Friendly Faces?

You know that line in Something’s Gotta Give about versions of the truth?  Jack’s character says, “I have always told you some version of the truth,” to which Diane’s character wryly responds, “The truth doesn’t have versions.”

She’s right. But it seems there are different versions of friends because, let’s face it, an awful lot of people have no idea what it means to be a real friend. 

Now, I understand friendships sometimes drift apart over the years due to distance, marriage, and/or children. Those things happen.  And I know people aren’t perfect—even true friends can make mistakes or say things they don’t mean. Again, those things happen. I’m not talking about changes in circumstances getting in the way of friendships; I’m talking about people who were never really your friend to begin with.  

I used to think friends meant being there in good and bad times, being supportive when they’re weak, helping them rise when they fall, and celebrating when they succeed.  I used to always think there was only one kind of friend.  Boy, was I as naïve as a little lamb trusting a slightly bigger lamb with unusually big fangs, gray pointy ears, and poorly fitted wool. 

It seems like the friend thing is getting worse. I hear it all the time: “She just stopped being my friend when I got a boyfriend;” “She says really cruel things to me, then turns around and brags about something in her life;” “He says he values my friendship, but only calls to flirt, then disappears for weeks.”

So, I’ve put together a short list of “friends” to avoid:  

1. Fair weather friend: These “friends” wear their masks very well. They give every indication of being a real friend until the bottom drops out, things get rough, and then they zippity-do-da right on outta there.  Ultimate Friend Fail: No better than a fair weather football fan—not loyal, unreliable. 

2. Foul weather friend: Polar opposite of fair weather.  When something makes you happy or fate hands you a golden egg, this “friend” goes M.I.A.  They are unconditional friends so long as your life, in their view, is less than stellar, but when your life finally decides to get good, they split.  Ultimate Friend Fail: They rejoice in your sorrow or failure; can’t be happy for you; total evil queen or king in manner of Maleficent.

3. Footstool friend: Like bacteria in human form, these charming sorts will be true as tar until you unwittingly help them reach a premeditated goal, at which point they will dump you and move to the next.  You are a means to their ends. You are only friend material if you know people, have something they want, or can get them to a particular place in life, whether professional or personal.  Ultimate Fried Fail: It’s all about them, the materialistic-Cruella de Vil-mongers.

4. Fire-stoking friend: The one who likes to stir up trouble.  This friend seems to cause strife between you and your other friends, family, and sometimes your boyfriend or significant other. Ultimate Friend Fail: The Siamese cats from Lady & the Tramp. ’Nuff said.

5. Fur-stroking friend: These types are in desperate need of an ego boost. Whether it’s a guy needing a little flirt after being rejected elsewhere or a girl wanting to show off about this or that, these friends keep you on speed dial for a quick “I am so great and wonderful” moment.  Ultimate Friend Fail: You are simply their mirror, mirror on the wall. 

Conclusion: If confronted by any of the above...run. True, real friends are hard to find, but when they do come along, it's special--they're almost a once in a lifetime kind-of-thing. 

Um, one more conclusion: People just kind-of suck sometimes.