True Blood Tuesday--Authority Always Wins

Photo Credit: HBO Publicity

Season Five, Episode Two

Okay, before we get started, I thought it might be good to have a little meet-and-greet with the Authority members. With them playing such a big role this season, I figured it might be nice to know a little bit about this new group of characters.

Members of the Authority Council:

Roman Zimojic—Known as the guardian, Roman is the leader and founder of the Authority. As such, he is essentially the supreme ruler of all vampires.

Dieter Braun—An Authority Chancellor. Dieter seems to enjoy torture-style interrogation.

Alexander Drew—He may have the face of an innocent nine-year-old child, but don’t let his appearances fool you—he’s a tough one. Alexander is a Chancellor with the Authority.

Salome—This Authority member is known as a world-class seductress and is quite formidable.

Rosalyn Harris—Originally from Prague, Rosalyn eventually settled in Texas. She is also a Chancellor and has a deep love of humanity.

Kibwe Akinjide—Chancellor, gentleman, and peaceful, are words to describe Kibwe. He is a fan of rehabilitation for rule-breakers, not punishment.

Now that we have our Authority members all straightened out, let’s jump into episode two.

Tara, Sookie, Lafayette, & Pam: Holy cow, Tara is freaking wild! She’s slamming Sook around and…oh, she just bit Sookie! Pam, finding it all very amusing, had no choice but to pull Tara off of Sookie and, as her maker, command that she not harm Lafayette or Sookie. Pam had to head back to Fangtasia, leaving one seriously out of control Tara with Lafayette and Sookie. Oh, I am so seeing Sookie’s house getting destroyed…again.

Eric, Bill, Nora, & Authority: Once inside a large, empty warehouse, Eric, Bill, and Nora are greeted by Salome, an ancient vampire and member of the Authority. Nora attempted to spin a story, but Salome wasn’t buying it. A quick elevator ride later, and they were in Authority headquarters. The atmosphere is fairly serious and imposing. We see vamps having to use their blood as proof of identity to gain entrance. After a brief walk-through, Eric, Bill, and Nora were thrown into individual cells.

Note: In a way, Authority headquarters reminded me of the Ministry of Magic when Voldemort’s gang took over. Don’t ask why; it’s just the first thing that popped into my head.

Alcide & the Pack: Ah, well, they’re still chomping down on Marcus. Ick. Martha recognizes Alcide as the new pack master and insists he, um, take a nibble out of Marcus, but Alcide has no interest, nor does he wish to abide by pack laws and join in on the let’s snack on Marcus festival. This doesn’t sit well with other pack members. Luna, meanwhile, takes Sam home.

Arlene & Terry: Um, it looks like Terry is possessed. Arlene wakes up to him looking at her, very zombie-like. He said, “We’re all gonna die. It’s coming for us.” Then, he flashbacked to his days in Iraq--none of the scenes made much sense, apart from a quick glimpse of a lighter.

Tara, Sookie, & Lafayette: Yep, Tara’s ripping the place up. She finally takes a break from the crazy and perches on the edge of the sink/counter to stare at Lafayette and Sookie. At Sookie’s suggestion, Lafayette gets Tara some True Blood, but she doesn’t appear interested. She seems more interested in staring at them—it’s rather unnerving. Oh! Yeah, she just attacked Lafayette! Hello, fangs! Pinning Lafayette to the floor, you could see she wanted to drink, but she knew she couldn’t do anything to him by order of her maker. She slapped her head, pulled her hair, and took off to tear up another part of the house.

Pam: Upon returning to Fangtasia, Pam starts to freshen up and begins thinking back on her early life. We see her in a brothel. It appears she was a Madame. When she goes to check on one of her girls, Claire, she finds her dead, slaughtered in one of the rooms. Pam, teary-eyed, swears at “them.” Back to present, Pam calls Eric, desperate to hear from him.

Note: SO glad to see some background on Pam. She is one of the best characters on the show—about time we see more of her story.

Eric, Bill, & Nora: While locked up, you hear a voice begin to interrogate the prisoners. Bill implores them to release Eric and Nora, taking the blame himself. The voice knows he’s lying and treats them to a heavy dose of ultra-violet light, which burned them just as the sun would.

Sam & Luna: While treating Sam’s wounds at her house, Martha shows up to see Emma, her granddaughter and only living relative. Martha just wants to know her granddaughter—it was actually rather sad. Luna, however, was royally p’od and didn’t want this woman anywhere near her daughter. Martha hypothesizes about what will happen when Emma turns wolf. Luna reminds her that she could be a shifter, not a wolf, but Martha just smiles and says Emma is wolf; she senses it. Over this whole thing, Luna kicks Martha out. On her way to the door, Martha apologizes to Sam for his injuries. Luna starts railing on Martha to Sam. However, Sam feels some compassion for the woman. Luna doesn’t take too kindly to Sam for this and kicks him out.

“She just lost her son,” he said.

“She just ate her son,” Luna countered.

This just might be the best exchange of the night.

Tara, Sookie, & Lafayette: Tara is STILL channeling the Tasmanian Devil and trashing the inside of the house. Amidst all of the bumping, crashing, and banging, Sookie and Lafayette know they have to get her in Eric’s hideaway before sunrise. Lafayette finds Tara hiding behind a door—she actually looked a bit frightened. He proceeds to cut his arm and offer her his blood, which she anxiously took. His blood was the perfect distraction: Sookie stormed in, wrapped silver chains around Tara’s neck, and helped carry her to Eric’s cubby.

Note: I thought it was interesting that Tara actually looked frightened when Lafayette found her—didn’t expect such fear in her eyes. Why would she be afraid? She’s a vampire now, and that should mean very little fear, if any.

Jason & Andy: Andy has a little one-on-one with Jason about sex. Pretty funny. Andy is a bit confused by Holly’s aloofness, and Jason assures him that it’s the perfect situation: get the goods without the obligation. Of course when Andy tries to relate his situation to what Jason has with Jess, it’s pretty obvious Jason isn’t buying into his own words.

Soon, they find Debbie’s abandoned car. While searching the automobile, Andy finds a vile of V and thinks about keeping it, but ultimately hands it over to Jason. Hurray! Good for you, Andy.

Sookie: Most girls like to shop for shoes, clothes, or handbags. Not Sook. No, she goes shopping at a stake shop. Yep, she went looking for something extra-anti-vampire to help protect her house when the uber vamp, Russell, comes fanging around. While contemplating what to purchase, Sook hears the salesman think about inviting her along on a vampire hunt, hoping he would get lucky. She very tactfully informs him that staking anyone—human or vampire—is illegal. She bought the silver mist machine and installed it just opposite her front door on the porch.

Note: Two things. First, the sales dude is watching Newlin talk about his new vampire life in a televised interview, so Sookie now knows all about Newlin…well, minus his love for her brother. Second, for such a simple scene, I absolutely loved the stake shop. These are the little things that, for me, really standout—a shop full of merchandise to ward off, combat, or kill vampires. It was like Home Depot for anti-vampire folks.

Arlene & Terry: While cooking at Merlotte’s, the flames rose up and Terry had more flashbacks. Still, none of them really told us anything, apart from being in some sort of shooting situation. When Arlene sweetly approached him, he spun around and shoved her clear across the kitchen. Terry feels bad for about a second before he flips out and screams at her.

Tara, Sookie, & Lafayette: After installing her new silver mist mechanism, Sookie “overhears” Lafayette thinking about staking Tara. Sook runs to Eric’s cubby and finds Lafayette standing over Tara’s body, holding a stake. He feels terribly guilty for turning his cousin into a monster. Sookie talks him out of staking her, reassuring him that it will get easier…that Tara is in there somewhere.

Jason& Andy: While at the station, Jason snacks and watches Newlin’s television interview, where he claims to have someone special in his life…a woman. Some kid shows up and punches Jason, blaming him for breaking up his parent’s marriage. Apparently, Jason slept with his mom. Naturally, Jason has no clue who this kid is talking about until he is shown a picture. The kid lunges at Jason, and Andy steps in to stop him. Andy then exasperatedly asks Jason if he’s slept with every woman in town. Jason, with that wide-eyed look, says, “I don’t know…I’m close, I guess.”

Note: I’m not sure what that was all about. It seemed a little out of place in the episode, but I’m guessing it’s setting something up for later in the season. And, um, while Jason watched the television, I couldn’t take my eyes of the Krispy Kreme doughnut box sitting behind him. Yum.

Pam: We immediately flashback with Pam. While in a darkened alley, Pam is taunted and then attacked by some Jack the Ripper type character.  Eric zooms in and slashes the guy’s throat, saving Pam’s life. He seemed to like that she wasn’t afraid of him. He told her that it’s not safe for a lady to be walking alone at night. In true Pam form, she replies, “If I meet a lady, I’ll let her know.” Eric was clearly intrigued by her energy. He zipped off after giving her some money to have her dress cleaned of the blood splatter.

Note: Anyone else loving the history of these two?  

Eric, Bill, & Authority: So, torture-happy Dieter, a smooth talking Authority member, is brought in to interrogate Bill, privately. Bill is hooked up to an IV filled with liquid silver.  

Dieter shows Bill the vampire “bible.” Here, we learn about Lilith. She predates Adam and Eve and was created in the likeness of God, who, in their bible, was also a vampire. Adam and Eve, as with all humans, were created as food for the vampires. This sacred text views humans as nothing more than vampire food. When asked, Bill says he doesn’t believe in the literal sense of the vampire bible. It seems old Dieter won’t take Bill’s word for it and wants to make certain his philosophy is one of coexistence with humans. So, even though Bill doesn’t believe in the literal meaning, Dieter injects him with liquid silver. Ouch.

Meanwhile, Salome is interrogating Eric in much the same way. She tells Eric Nora is dead!!! Okay, I’m hoping this is a scare tactic. Eric handles the news calmly, yet you can plainly see he wants to rip the throat of the Authority b*!ch. She then asks which of them murdered Nan—Eric plays dumb and gets a shot of silver. More ouch.

Now, Dieter tries to convince Bill that Eric and Nora have been freed—this still doesn’t shake the former king…and he gets more silver juice.

Salome, on the other hand, attempts gain information by telling Eric that Bill has been freed, and, for his cooperation, he will be reinstated as King. Eric simply responds with a, “Long live the King.” Oh, so loving the solidarity, here…however, am not loving Eric getting another shot of silver.

Jessica & Newlin: Jess is throwing another college party at Bill’s mansion. Before some girl can spew chunks all over the floor, she throws her outside, and waiting at the door is Newlin. Upon seeing it’s party time, he scoots by Jess, dancing, smiling, and grooving. He mingles a bit, smiling that goofy grin, but Jess wants him to get to the point of his visit. She asks him what he wants. Apparently, he just wants to talk. Okay, this guy’s smile is hilarious—he’s such a little worm, but in a funny way. Jess takes him to Bill’s office, and Newlin proceeds to offer her $10,000 for Jason. LOL Jess, not missing a beat, wants twenty grand. Newlin laughs it off, reiterating his offer. Jess then does a little fang teasing—you know, things like how a vamp can chip a fang on Jason’s butt. This leads to a worked up Newlin and a new offer of fifteen grand. Jess continues with a little rock hard talk. Newlin is getting the picture…and out pop the fangs. LOL He gives in to her demand for twenty grand, but Jess was just playing with him. She makes it very clear that Jason is her friend and not for sale. Newlin, a wee bit frustrated, tries to attack her—she pins him, he pulls her hair (“Hair pullin’? Really?), and she yanks his hair in return, reminding him that her daddy is the king. Newlin smiles and says, “Not anymore.” This pisses Jess off. She kicks a cackling Newlin out of her house, along with everyone else.

Note: I love this new, powerful, take charge Jessica. Love the way the writers have evolved her character over the series.

Arlene, Terry, & Patrick: Arlene seeks answers from Patrick, but he won’t give anything up to her. Terry apparently followed Arlene to Patrick’s hotel room. He’s not thrilled, but asks to talk to Patrick alone. Arlene gives both of them a stern warning: Whatever is going on, fix it. Once she’s gone, Terry tells Partick that their missing Army buddy is alive, just off grid. Patrick is convinced that he’s the one hurting them. Terry and Patrick agree to pay him a visit.

Note: Okay, I have no clue what is going on here. What supernatural thing could they be bringing into the mix this time? One thing I’m absolutely clear on, however: Scott Foley is just as handsome as he was on Felicity.

Hoyt, Jason, and Maxine Fortenberry: Jason tries to extend an olive branch to Hoyt, but his former BFF isn’t interested. In front of Hoyt, Maxine shouts at Jason, saying she will never forgive him for what he did to her son. As she shoves him out the door, she quietly thanks him for splitting up Hoyt and “that redheaded slut.” Oh, and she adds, “I’m gonna bake you a pie.”

Luna & Emma: Luna’s little girl was making a lot of noise in her room. Luna tries calling to her, telling her to go to bed, but the odd noises continue. Luna opens the door and finds a baby wolf in a pair of pajamas. Awwwwwww! Okay, way too cute!

Tara, Sookie & Lafayette: Tara woke up, walked to Sookie and Lafayette, and said, “I will never forgive either of you.” She flew out of the house and…oh no…got sprayed by the silver mister Sookie installed. Oh, that’s going to tick her off even more.

Note: I really hope this doesn’t last long. I know there are a lot of fans who don’t like Tara, and her new vampire attitude isn’t going to help. I’ve always liked her character, but I’m ready for her to be a strong force on team Sookie and company. I guess she still needs to adjust.

Eric, Bill, Nora, & Authority: It looks like we’re now seeing the main office for the Auhtority—it’s dark, yet ornate. The main Authority members (listed above) are sitting at a table, and Bill and Eric are handcuffed and kneeling in front of them. Nora is alive, standing under the control of two Authority guards.

Roman walks in, cuts his wrist, and begins some ritual to Lilith. He feeds each member a drop of his blood.

He goes on a little ego trip-lecture about his role with the Authority and what they stand for. Afterwards, the council debates a little on whether or not Bill and Eric should get the true death. Here’s how it stands amongst council members: Rosalyn votes true death; Kibwe says no, since they saved them from the witches; Alexander votes true death.

Roman acknowledges that they’ve been at odds over what to do with Bill and Eric. He reiterates that the coexistence with humans is necessity.

Bill offers an exchange: “Our lives in return for Russell Edgington.” They inform Roman that Russell was never killed…and he has escaped. Russell is totally against coexistence, so he’s an enemy of the Authrotiy; he wants anarchy.

Bill tells them if they want their administration to be obliterated, ignore what he says. Roman wants to know why they didn’t kill Russell when they had the chance. Bill and Eric said they wanted Russell to suffer, believing the truth death was too good for him.

Guardian Roman goes a little wacky and feigns staking Bill. But he holds off, placing his wants on the back burner. Russell will be seeking Bill and Eric, a fact our brotherly duo makes clear to the Authority. And in one final gesture of solidarity, Bill vows to stop Russell, understanding he may meet the true death either way.

Russell: Okay, now we’re looking at a dank, dungeon-like room with dead bodies and body part all over the floor. The camera pans to a really messed up looking vamp resting on a cot. Russell.

So, what did you think of this week’s episode? For me, it wasn’t as strong as episode one, but it served the purpose of introducing us to the Authority. I did love being introduced to Pam’s history with Eric. The Terry/Patrick thing is a bit confusing, but I suppose that’s how they want us to feel…for the time being. I’m still all for Tara being a vampire…but I really want to see her embrace her new power for the better and realize she can help protect her friends and family.

DALE JR. WINS AT MICHIGAN!!!!!

What an amazing, amazing win! Dale Jr. literally blew the field away today. Driving his Batman themed 88, Dale Jr. cruised to victory lane…and the crowd went wild, literally.

The last laps were the longest in history, I swear it. I haven’t paced that much since football season ended. I may never know love, but I Thank God I know what it’s like to feel passion, pride, and loyalty for a man/team who works and tries and never gives up.

One day, I hope to see that 88 race in person.

Anyway, Mom and I fought back the tears, and Dad clapped and said, “Attaboy, Dale!”

Dale Jr. won on Father’s Day. Need I say more? There’s something really poetic and beautiful about getting his win today.

And, um, to the “sports journalist” who just this past week said Dale would never win another race…ha and kindly [fill in the blank]. Truthfully—and I do mean this in the most sincere sense imaginable—if someone can watch what the 88 team has done all season long and still write an article listing reasons why Dale would never again see the sunny side of victory lane for the remainder of his career, then perhaps a better understanding of NASCAR is needed before said someone puts forth material that makes him look rather ridiculous. And one more teeny, tiny little thing…why—so—serious? (Couldn’t help myself…had to go with the Batman theme today)

Consistently solid finishes leads to wins. Simple as that.

Many will undoubtedly focus on Dale breaking that dang winless streak that has been magnified into Godzilla over the years. Or perhaps they’ll discuss his many close, but no cigar moments. Not me, though. No, this Dale fan thinks it’s all about this moment forward.

Today, Batman and his batmobile grabbed that checkered flag…and it’s just the beginning. Stay tuned, Gotham…

Truth Is Thursday: Dallas Returns

Dallas, Then: Photo Credit, CBS Archives, Getty Images

You know I love my hometown. You know I’m a rabid Dallas Cowboys fan. Pretty sure you’ve seen me go ballistic over the Dallas Mavericks.

So it probably won’t shock you to know I’m a huge fan of the television show, Dallas. And today, it’s all about the return of the Ewings, Southfork, the Cattle Baron’s Ball, backstabbing, double secret backstabbing, and that iconic theme…it’s Dallas, in full force.

Last night, Dallas returned on TNT with a new generation, but don’t fret, J.R., Bobby, and Sue Ellen were all very much present. Oh, I was in 8th heaven, Texas style (and who wore #8? Aikman. Yeah, I went there).

I watched the original when I was a little girl with my mama, so to see it return with so many of its original qualities was as awesome as a Thanksgiving Day win in Cowboys Stadium.

If you enjoyed the original Dallas, you will enjoy its return—it’s got everything. The cast is pitch-perfect, the plot is as twisted, deliciously juicy, and unpredictable as its predecessor, and the familiar Texas landmarks hug us like a big blanket of bluebonnets.

This Dallas Texan gives it two very enthusiastic Yee-haw’s!

What exactly is my truth this Thursday?

Truth Is: I love Dallas! Welcome back! And I must not be the only one…Dallas won the night in ratings!

“Bettin' against J.R.’s son would be like bettin' against the Dallas Cowboys…downright unpatriotic.”~Dallas, 2012, Episode One. 

Dallas comes on every Wednesday at 9 EST.

Dallas, Now: Photo Credit, TNT Publicity

 

 Dallas 2012 Trailer, TNT (there may be an ad you can skip at the beginning):



Updated Dallas Theme, 2012--I LOVE that they have the shot of Cowboy's stadium, just like the original did with Texas Stadium, and ended on that zooming shot of Southfork! Awesome! (THANK YOU, TNT, for keeping to the original theme...Dallas just wouldn't be Dallas without it).

True Blood Tuesday: Turn! Turn! Turn!

Credit: HBO

 Season Five, Episode One.

After a phenomenal Game of Thrones season finale, I had my expectations pretty darn high for the start of True Blood. How was it? Well…it didn’t disappoint. We had emotion, action (of all kinds), humor, and a mega GASP moment. Can’t ask for much more than that.

So, let’s jump in the coffin and head back to Bon Temps!

Sookie, Tara, Lafayette, Pam, Bill, & Eric: We ended last season with dumb Debbie shooting a chunk out of Tara’s head when she jumped in front of the bullet to save Sookie. Sook, crying for help, held her best friend’s lifeless body on the floor of her kitchen.

The season starts at the point when Debbie attempts to shoot Sookie. Here, instead of re-watching what happened, we flash to Bill and Eric, sensing the dangerous situation facing Sookie. Eric, still feeling the sting of Sookie dumping him, continues cleaning up the mess Bill made when he delivered the true death to Nan. Despite sensing Sookie’s trouble, Eric remained steadfast about getting the mess cleaned and getting out of there before the Authority could catch them. Bill, however, couldn’t sit idly by while his favorite fairy was in danger. He took off to help her, but was trapped by the Authority just outside his mansion, along with Eric.

Note: For me, the fact that Bill hurried off to help Sookie highlighted the difference between his love and Eric’s love [for Sookie]. Eric was busy thinking about saving their hides, while Bill put Sookie’s safety first.

Meanwhile, Pam shows up at Sookie’s looking for Eric. Instead, she finds Sookie and Lafayette crying over Tara’s body. Though Pam couldn’t give two fangs for Tara, Lafayette begs her to change his cousin. Pam, however, won’t sire Tara without payment—Sookie has to fix things between Pam and Eric AND still “owe her [Pam] one.” This could get interesting.

Even if Pam successfully changes Tara, there is a chance she will “…rise up out of the ground fu*&tarded,” since half her head’s been blown off.

Pam, wearing a yellow Wal-Mart sweat-suit —much to her displeasure—agrees to be buried with Tara…even though she smells. And so, Sookie and Lafayette bury Tara with Pam.

Jason, Steve Newlin, & Jessica: So, vampire-hating Newlin is now a vampire himself. That, we knew. The next big shocker? He’s gay, y’all, AND in love with Jason!!! Poor, unsuspecting Jason fell for the “abandoned,” newborn vampire act, which allowed Newlin to glamour our beloved Stackhouse.  Once inside casa Stackhouse, Newlin reveals his love for Jason…but he’s climbing the leg of a man that doesn’t “bark” that way. The Rev apparently doesn’t take rejection well—he goes all angry fang-y and attempts to force Jason into loving him.

Enter Jessica.

Jess bursts through the door, claims Jason as hers, and informs the little newbie vamp that she’s older and the progeny of the king of Louisiana.  Oh, and King Daddy is out of town, which means she’s basically the queen. Talk about putting Newlin in his place! With her hand clasped around his neck, she gives him a choice: leave or get the true death. Seriously. Awesome. Scene. Go Jess! Jason rescinds Newlin’s invitation, and the slimy, manipulative little worm is forced to leave.

Sam, Luna, & the pack: Looks like the pack knows their master is dead. They confront Sam, but he manages to shift and fly away. Now at Luna’s, Sam tells her he won’t give up Alcide to the pack—Alcide saved his life, and he refuses to return the favor by telling the pack that their resident sexy were was the one who actually killed Marcus. Just as Luna begins to protest his refusal, the pack shows up and says they won’t hurt Luna or Emma if Sam leaves with them. Being the upstanding guy he is…Sam goes with them.

Note: Very nice bum, Sir Sam. What? It’s a valid observation. *blushes*

Bill, Eric, & Nora: With Bill and Eric locked in the trunk of an Authority car, the two vamps work together to blow the thing up, figuring they’d survive it. It worked. Eric hurried to check on a slightly injured Bill, refusing to leave him behind. The driver, unfortunately, survived the explosion and threatened to kill both of them. Before he could decide who to kill first, Nora, the girl who was traveling in the passenger seat of the car, killed the driver, saving Eric and Bill.

Eric whispered her name, walked towards her, and laid one heckuva kiss on her.

Note: Great kiss, Eric. Great kiss. Seriously hot. So jealous of Nora right now.

Turns out, Nora is Eric’s “sister.” They share the same maker, Godric. Nora is a chancellor with the Authority, but isn’t working to their agenda. Eric, Bill, and Nora head into a storage unit thingy before sunrise. The next night, Eric and Bill will be forced to assume new identities and leave Louisiana forever.

Sookie & Lafayette: Sookie heads to Lafayette’s house to help bury Jesus…except his body is gone. Sookie thinks Eric or Bill might have helped dispose of the body. She heads to the car to give Lafayette some time to say goodbye. Poor Lafayette is falling apart—he doesn’t know how to keep on breathing.

Andy & Holly: Well, it looks like Andy and Holly had a fun Halloween—they found their tricks and treats on the couch of her house. Holly’s sons come home early from their hunting trip to find them, um, you know.

Arlene, Terry, and Patrick: Terry is extra touchy and clearly does not want to revisit the past. While having breakfast at the Bellefleur mansion, Patrick learns that Terry, Arlene, and the kids are only staying with Andy and company because of a house fire. At this little reveal, Patrick started acting weird, like a light bulb switched on over his head or something. Later, he confronted Terry in back of Merlotte’s. Terry just wants his old friend to go back home, but Patrick says he doesn’t have a home…he lost it in a fire…and he wasn’t the only one. Fires have destroyed the homes of several other men in their squad. Patrick said these fires have something to with what happened in Iraq. Apparently, he thought Terry was the one responsible for the fires. When Patrick realized Terry wasn’t to blame, he figured his old war buddy might want to help, which he doesn’t—Terry just wants everything to go away.

Note: How good is it to see Scott Foley? Still, he’ll always be Noel to me. :)

Sookie: Here, Sookie thinks back on some childhood moments with Tara. Looks like Sookie was bullied as a child because of her telepathy, and Tara was the one to save her. Could be foreshadowing if Tara becomes a vampire???

Note: I actually loved the flashback of Sookie and Tara. Is it just me, or was the actress that played young Sookie seriously perfect? She looked so much like Anna, it was uncanny.

Alcide, Sookie, & Lafayette: There he is! Been waiting for Mr. Alcide to make an appearance! Alcide shows up at Sookie’s to warn her about Russell Edgington. This, of course, comes as a shock to Sookie, who thought the nutcase was dead. Worried about Sookie’s safety, Alcide asks her to stay with him. (Oh, just go, Sook. Seriously.) However, Sookie’s guilty conscience over Debbie won’t allow her to stay with Alcide. So, she starts to confess, but Lafayette storms into the kitchen and puts a stop to it.

Note: Sookie, obviously nervous about Alcide being there, spotted Debbie’s tooth/tooth tissue on the floor. She kicked it under something so he wouldn’t see it. My question is this: How could he not smell the tissue attached to the tooth? I get that she cleaned massively well, but wouldn’t that tissue/tooth hold enough of a scent?

Note: Quite liked the growl Alcide gave Lafayette. This show is just so good for my hormones.

Andy & Judge: New big wig alert—it seems this Judge Clements has Andy in his back pocket. Judge got Andy to toss out his son’s speeding ticket. That’s really all we had, but I’m guessing he was introduced for a reason.

Jason & Hoyt: We had a brief encounter at Merlotte’s between the former best friends. Unfortunately, it didn’t go so well. Hoyt’s hurting and has no use for Jason.

Eric, Nora, & Bill: My, my. What a nice bum you have, Eric. Yep, Eric and Nora are having some quality time against the wall of the storage unit, while Bill waits outside. Halfway through their, um, exercise, Eric’s phone rings. Naturally, he’s not supposed to have a phone being on the lamb and all, which Nora reminds him. They spat, and Eric exits the unit, saying to Bill, “We fight like siblings, but we [blank] like champions.”  So, who’s on the phone? It’s Alcide, presumably with the news of Russell’s escape. Pretty sure the next scene confirms this—we see someone dragging a barely conscious human to a cell, toss him halfway inside, and whatever’s in there eats him alive. Yeah, sounds like a Russell thing to do.

Jessica & Jason: Jess is really toying with Jason. He shows up at Bill’s mansion while Jess is having a little college-esque party. He doesn’t like the idea of her partying without him, so he throws off the cop clothes and joins in. During the party, Jess flirts it up with some guy and even kisses him. Jason is obviously hurt. One of the sorority girls hits on him, and he decides to go all old Jason and leave with her. But, when push comes to shove, he can’t sleep with the sorority chick. It seems Jason is too much the smitten kitten with Miss Jessica. Aww.

Eric, Bill, & Nora: On the docks, Eric, Bill, and Nora meet up with some vamps who give our boys new identities and provide the get-out-of-town transportation. Before they can leave, the Authority vamps show up and kill all the fanged ones, except for Eric, Bill, and Nora. I’m thinking they’re in trouble.

Sam, the pack, Luna, & Alcide: In exchange for Luna and Emma’s safety, Sam leads the pack to their former leader’s burial site. They dig him up, and Marcus’ mama, Martha, transforms and, well, eats her son’s flesh. Ew. Alcide shows up with Luna and tells the pack the truth—that he killed Marcus, not Sam. Some of the pack members bow to Alcide, recognizing him as their new master. Others aren’t so forgiving, which doesn’t bother Alcide either way. He’s so man…and wolf.

Note: Did anyone else hear Luna say, “Don’t do it, Martha,” just before the mama wolf transformed and ate her son’s dead body? If she did, I wonder what she meant. Was it just an ew thing, or is Luna aware of something that might happen if the flesh is consumed?

Sookie, Lafayette, Pam, & Tara: Waiting to see if Pam was in time to save Tara, Sookie and Lafayette wait by her grave. Eventually, Pam crawls out, complains about dirt in her bra, grabs a bottle of True Blood (yeah, she doesn’t like it so much), and points Sookie in the direction of Tara’s head. Sookie starts digging, but Tara is still as stone. It didn’t work. Staring at her best friend’s peaceful face, she sobs. Sookie and Lafayette cry over their loss.

HOLY CRUD! GOOSEBUMP ALERT! Tara EXPLODED from the grave, completely out of her mind, and headed straight for Sookie!!! END OF EPISODE.

Seriously, I have goosebumps!!! AWESOME start to the season.

Quick thoughts: Pam stole the episode; Eric and Bill’s brotherly love thing is seriously adorable; Tara…wicked!  It looks like Tara is kind of 100% vampire right now, completely out of touch with her former human self. I’m looking forward to seeing her strong, and, hopefully in time, she will be able to join Sookie in this fight against any big bad that comes upon them.

Truth Is Thursday: True Blood, Sweat, & Soda

Truth Is: I've stopped soda cold turkey. 3 days and counting. It doesn't sound like much, I know, but for me, it's an achievement. lol I'm sure the twitching will stop eventually. ;) And the headaches...

Truth Is: True Blood returns this weekend! Vampires, weres, and shifters, oh my!

Truth Is: Dale Jr. is having a seriously awesome season. Consistency is absolutely key, and he's just cruising right along. The wins are around the corner. Patience and consistency will lead to winner's circle.

Truth Is: Congrats to the Thunder! After the way they played the Mavs last year, I knew they would be a huge force in no time.

Truth Is: Okay, Celtics...win it. Win it for Eva and BFF! GO BOSTON!

Truth Is: My mom loves her Kindle...you know, the thing you read on...except she uses it to play games. LOL

Truth Is: I'm just going to leave y'all with a little True Blood preview...and a pic to, well, wet your appetite (all puns totally intended).

Trailer One: 



Trailer Two: 



"Must be Thursday!"

Joe Manganiello; Photo Credit: Men's Health UK

Truth Is Thursday: The Eyes Have It

Truth Is: I *think* I see the light at the end of the tunnel where my blogging absence is concerned. I CAN'T WAIT to catch up and read blogs again. I MISS YOU ALL.

Truth Is: My printer ran out of ink at the absolute worst moment. Here's the thing: it didn't even let me know it was running low. Usually, the print will look lighter or something. Nope, nothing. It looked fabulous, then just stopped and said, "Black Ink Out." I pushed the on/off about a zillion times because I didn't trust the whole "black ink out" thing. Still, nothing. I'm convinced there's black ink still in there somewhere.

Truth Is: Wilderness Guy wanted to teach me how to pluck a chicken.  I can't emphasize the "no" enough, here.

Truth Is:  Never, ever have a cheesy nacho snack at night. Made this mistake. Won't make it again. There's a reason I'm not a snack person, apart from cereal. Must stick to cereal.

Truth Is: Mom was all excited about some diner-like mustard and ketchup bottles she found. She said they were super cute...with faces. Sadly, I didn't remember this little detail over the weekend. Had I remembered, I might have avoided a rather spastic me moment.

I walked into the kitchen, opened the fridge for some milk, and was face-to face with this:

My reaction: Funky-freaked face, yelp, stumble, and butt-slam into the dishwasher. I swear, for a second, I thought something had possessed the contents of the fridge, like some Poltergeist movie.

The next time I face the blinking duo will be Memorial Day Weekend, and though I will not be spooked again, I'm pretty sure they will take great pleasure in mocking me...don't they have a mocking kind of look? Don't get me wrong, they're cute and all, but...they are a little creepy when you're not expecting them. lol

Anyway, I hope everyone has a WONDERFUL Memorial Day! God Bless all of our brave men and women, past, present, and future.

Truth Is Thursday: Life Is Quite Nosy

Truth Is: Dear Willoughby, I have so much to say to you, but I'm not going to whisper a single syllable. You simply cannot see what you do. It's okay. Humans are beautifully complex that way. But I cannot, and will not, be your Marianne. No, this Marianne needs her Colonel Brandon.

Truth Is: CSI: Miami was cancelled! Very sad. No more Horatio. :(

Truth Is: I miss my Mavs. When I think back on this time last year…the stress, nausea, pacing, heart pounding, and rocking back and forth on the edge of my seat; the highs and lows of wins and losses; the utter thrill of victory…it's a great feeling. Good luck to all you fans whose teams are still in the hunt--enjoy every single second, good, bad, and in between. There's nothing like it.

Truth Is: Mom got her Kindle for Mother's Day…with "wee-fee." She's hilarious with it. At first, she was completely clueless. Now, she's zooming around the thing like she's had it for years. Dad and I are very proud of her.

Truth Is: Life sent me a message on Mother's Day. Not joking.

Woke up Sunday to a little text jingle.

"Hmm, wonder who that is," I said, checking the number. "Don't recognize that number, but it is local. Maybe BFF got another new number."

I clicked on the text and very nearly fell out of bed.

"HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! Love, Life"

"Screw you, Life. Screw you." Yep, that was my spontaneous reaction.

Being single doesn't suck--beats being alone in a relationship. Still, Life needs to stay the hell out of it and shut the blank-ity-blank up.

So Much For Regular Blogging...

I really thought I'd be able to return to regular blogging.  So wrong.  I'm trying, y'all, I promise. 

Updates and random things:

* My Mavs got the big bad sweep handed to them by the Thunder. :( Sigh. Kind of a tough way to end the season. On the bright side, the first two games could have easily been wins for the Mavs. Yeah, I'll look ANYWHERE for that stupid bright side.

* Dale Jr. snagged another top ten finish! Whoop! One thing I don't get: When you have a man who is completely brilliant on restrictor plate tracks, why won't drivers work with him? (his teammates, for the most part, were out of the race) I don't get it. If there's anyone I'd want pushing my butt around the track, it's him. Or vice versa. Um. I didn't mean that the way it sounded. *big time blushes*

* Explain this to me: WHY is it when life gets hectic in one area of your life, the other area of your life suddenly and inexplicably decides to get interesting...right when you have the least amount of time to, you know, be interested in the interest? Hmm. Did that make sense?

* Have you ever met Wilderness Guy? I have. Known him for years.  Didn't really realize the extent of his load-the-gun-and-bow ways.  Wilderness Guy is showing an increasing interest. Have I mentioned I'm not Wilderness Girl? Yeah. I like my food de-feathered, you know? And he likes fish. I hate fish. Fish + me = copious amounts of embarrassing badness.

* Oh, Lord, my dad pulled one on my mom. Just to mess with her, he started skip-hopping along the porch smack dab where their new neighbors could see him. LOL My mom was mortified. She said the neighbors probably think he's out of his mind. My dad's response? "That's the point." LOL The funniest part? My mom thought he looked a little like E.T. when he scurries. LOL

Okay, that's it for now. I just wanted to check in. I have tons to write up--I just need to carve out some time. And please know I love you all, and I'm not trying to go all invisible woman or anything--it's just hectic right now.

Superhero? Me? Um, okay!

My Mavs lost in the last second of the game against the Thunder. Tough loss, but they played super hard, and OK got a really lucky bounce at the end.

Dale Jr. finished 2nd this weekend at Richmond!!! When he drove up to second, the crowd went absolutely nuts! It was awesome. He drove a brilliant race.

Now, are y'all ready for some fun? Jay, a.k.a. The Awesome Quiz Finder, posted this little gem a while back:  Which Superhero are you?

So, I took the quiz, and...

Your results:
You are Wonder Woman

You are a beautiful princess with great strength of character.

Wonder Woman 75% Spider-Man 70% Robin 65% The Flash 60% Green Lantern 60% Superman 55% Supergirl 50% Hulk 40% Catwoman 20% Iron Man 10% Batman 0%

I'M WONDER WOMAN!!! How cool is that?! I get the super cute accessories, which, let's face it, is reason alone to be Wonder Woman. 

Looks like Spidey was a close second. Maybe I could invent a new one...Wonder-Spider-Woman or something. Maybe not.

Anyway, I am going to totally think of myself as Wonder Woman for the rest of the week (why not, right?). 

I hope y'all will take this quiz and let me know your secret superhero identity!

Truth Is Thursday: Empty Words, Scum, and An Odd Crush

Truth Is: I've been getting quality sleep...yay...just not enough...boo.

Truth Is: I know I didn't get to mention this earlier, but my Mavs are back in the playoffs! Whoop!

Truth Is: Dear Sorta Friend, if you truly want a forever kind of love, as you claim, then you are going to have to learn to keep your word.  Women cannot possibly fully trust you if you maintain the practice of empty words.  I'm not sure why this is so difficult for you to see, and why you insist on blaming the women for not handing over the keys to their heart.  Trust is earned.  Empty words?  So not the way to earn it. I should know, since you pulled that act on me a time or two.

Truth Is:  Dale Jr. finished 7th this past Sunday. So loving the consistently good finishes.

Truth Is:  Have y'all heard about the website that encourages married people to cheat on their spouses?  Scummy.  Yeah, well, now it's apparently offering $1 million to any woman who can prove she has had sex with Tim Tebow.  Double scummy.  As you may know, Tim has stated he is waiting until marriage to have sex.

Why do this?  I mean, he is who he is.  Let him be.  Let him live HIS life the way HE sees fit.  Perhaps some people on the opposite end of the moral spectrum--like those who encourage infidelity--feel threatened by people like Tim Tebow. And why?  He's not bothering them. He made a choice--we ALL make choices that are best for us, for our lives, and no one, not a single person on this planet, has the right to make you feel bad about it. 

Truth Is: So, my mom wants a Kindle with--are you ready?--"Wee Fee" capability.  Wee Fee instead of Wi-Fi (why, fye--rhymes with eye).  lol

Truth Is: I have some unusual crushes.  My latest one? Horatio Caine on CSI: Miami.  *blushes*  He's just so manly man-man, totally protective, with a great voice, and super one-liners.  Of course, I totally wouldn't turn away Eric Delko from CSI: Miami, either. ;)

Male Monogamists--An Urban Man Myth?

Behold an example of the rare, nearly extinct species called Male Monogamists. 

Daniel Radcliffe of Harry Potter fame (and The Woman In Black) recently stated that he is a serial monogamist.  And, yes, he is happily in love.

The man is only 22 years old.  TWENTY-TWO, thinking the way a thirty or forty-year-old man should think.

Perhaps Dan should hold a seminar and relay this notion of monogamy to older men, since the concept seems lost on many of them (not all, mind you, but, dang, there are quite a few who just can’t seem to stay with one woman).  

Dan also mentioned an incident where some woman implicitly invited him to have sex with her, even going so far as providing him with her hotel number.  Ugh.  Self-respect, ladies! Self-respect!    

I suppose Male Monogamists do, indeed, exist, though I'm convinced they are an endangered species.

Then, awwww:

Credit: Getty Images

Now, Mr. Harry Handsome:

Credit: Esquire

The Urban Love Myth

The Urban Love Myth

Tell Bridget Jones, call Carrie Bradshaw, channel Jane Austen, and alert the white jackets. And someone, please, slap me silly because I have done something beyond comprehension. 

The thing with which I must hide my head in shame: While watching the wedding scene of The Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn, Part I…I cried. We’re talking the salty tears, snotty nose variety, here, folks.  And I was really pathetic when they started playing Flightless Bird, American Mouth…yeah, hello, Kleenex. 

My mind, which was thoroughly repulsed, screamed, “You don’t cry at Twilight!” (totally modified that from Tom Hanks circa A League of Their Own).

It was a totally impulsive, unfiltered reaction, and I couldn’t help but wonder why.  Then, it hit me: the reason my tears flowed wasn’t for the vampire and his flightless bird, it was because I envied the love they shared, and, more importantly, I wondered about its existence in reality.

And, yes, I know it’s a movie, a book, fake, so not the real world, blah, blah, blah.  I get that; I’m not delusional.  But…in all honesty, shouldn’t that supposed unrealistic love be part of our world? I mean, minus the bloodsucking, bruising, and rapidly growing baby, followed by gruesome birth stuff. 

So, the trillion dollar question:  Does that kind of inconvenient, heart-stopping, endless love actually exist in our reality?  If we’re patient, and look with our hearts, yes, I believe it does.   

I could easily say it doesn’t exist.  Why?  Because it’s the easy answer.  It’s an easy way to explain away the frustration, the perpetual Singletonville address, and, in some cases, settling with someone you know isn’t right for you. 

See, I think many people today are so jaded that, on some level, they settle for what’s easy or convenient because they figure they’ll never find the real thing.  I’ve known people who have married because they believed that person was the best they could do at the time.  Then, of course, you have the men who marry based on lust, women who marry for money, etc.  None of these scenarios equal the kind of love I’m talking about—the kind of love we all yearn for…and we all deserve.  

People are so quick to say true love is only for books and movies.  But, I don’t think that’s true.  The only reason we don’t see it in everyday life is because no one steps up and actually makes it happen. 

If everyone settles or rushes into something “just because,” then, naturally, the concept of a soul mate becomes more of an urban love myth than an actuality.  No wonder so many people don’t believe movie-love exists—they’re all too busy crapping on the idea.

Maybe if we trusted our hearts a little more, gave credit to our instincts, and took chances, we’d look at the world and it would remind us of An Affair to Remember or a Jane Austen novel, rather than just leaving us wishing for some elusive dream. 

I’m pretty sure some people think I’m a fool, waiting for something I may never find.  Maybe I am.  But, I’d rather be a believing fool, than alone in a relationship, wishing I had trusted in something that’s seemingly unbelievable. 

There are many different kinds of love, bringing people together, making us happy.  So, why sell one brand of love short?  If love really does make the world go round, then giving up on any part of it is like helping to end the world (in a manner of dramatic speaking).

Maybe never giving up isn’t such a bad thing after all.  

And so ends this episode of Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, otherwise known as my single gal brain dump. 

**This was a guest post I wrote for the wonderful Janie Junebug. She mentioned posting it here as well, but in my sleep deprived state, I plum forgot. 

Truth Is Thursday--Zzzzz

Truth Is:  Need sleep.  Dear Upcoming Weekend:  Kindly deliver the relaxation.  The past couple of weeks have kicked my rear from the first minute of daylight on Monday.  What is it about the start of Spring that triggers the mouth of hell to grin and open wide?  Ugh.  Can I get a “Thank goodness it’s almost Friday?”

Truth Is: My Mavs are one win away from a playoff lock.  I know they are the defending champs, and last season was a dream come true, so I'm not greedy--I just really want them in the playoffs. 

Truth Is: Dale finished 10th in Texas last weekend.  Top 10 ranks as consistently solid finishes, though I do wish Texas had served him up a win. 

Truth Is: Zzzzzz...oops...sorry...dozed off for a sec. 

Truth Is:  Friend confessed to me that a woman he had been dating completely fooled him, i.e. She wasn't a very nice person...AT ALL.  Guess who told him as much over a year ago? Yep, that would be me.  Read her like a book.  Although, I will say, some of the things she did and said even surpassed my rather unfavorable impression of her.  Piece. Of. Work.

As with anyone, ya gotta remove the wool and look for that person's true nature.  You'll either find a sweet (or saucy, but sweet)  little lamb, or a manipulating wolf-beast.  If the latter, run.  Immediately. 

Truth Is: I'm hoping for all it's worth to return to regularly scheduled blogging next week.  I've missed everyone. 

Truth Is: I was watching Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason.  It was in the DVD player, and, well, I was too dang lazy to get up and change it out.  You know what I totally overlooked about the film?  The song Like A Virgin makes a big appearance.  Like A Virgin...in a film about a perpetually single, 30-something dating disaster.  On the plus side, she does end up with Mr. Darcy, right?  So...bright side....look on the bright side.  We won't talk about the fact that when I turned off the DVD and flicked to the Big Band music station, Bing Crosby (crush of mine) was singing Have You Met Miss Jones?" No joke.  Sometimes the bright side is a little too bright.

Truth Is: Zzzzz...huh?  Oh.  Must have nodded off...again. 

Pure Smiles

If you ever need to smile, I can't imagine anything else doing the trick.  This is one of my very favorite songs set to scenes I bet y'all will recognize.  The video is truly beautifully done. 

Welcome to Pure Imagination.

Want To Laugh?

I know my blogging has been sporadic at best. I'm thinking it's the change of seasons--if the weather isn't attacking my sinuses, it's distracting my brain cells.  Of course, it doesn't help that my free time is sort of limited right now.

Just have to have a GO DALE moment--he finished 3rd Sunday at Martinsville, placing him 2nd in Cup Standings. Whoop! Truthfully, I thought Hendrick would finish first, second, and third...until a completely avoidable caution set off a series of unfortunate events, including one that took out Jimmie and Jeff.  Dale made it through, but not without pretty significant damage.  Awesome job by Dale getting through that mess and finishing 3rd.

My mom is a big fan of the Food Network, and, over the years, she has introduced me to some awesome shows, including Chopped, Restaurant Impossible, The Next Iron Chef, Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives, and Paula Deen.  Yes, I watch Food Network about as much as I do HGTV.  What can I say?  I like watching people cook up yummy food and house hunt.

Anyway, my mom showed me this spoof of Paula Deen, and I about lost it.  If you're in need of a good laugh, tears and all, then this just might do the trick. Hope you enjoy.

Here's Melanie Hutsell, of Saturday Night Live fame, as Paula Deen (who was a great sport during this segment.)