Monday, November 7, 2011

Lights = Aliens...Sort of.

Well, this was a fantabulous sports weekend.

College Football: Very big game this past weekend. My daddy has a team, my mama has a team, and I grew up loving both with everything in me, but I refuse to jinx by saying too much, so I'll just say this one word...Geaux.

Cowboys: Won!

Dale Jr: 7th at Texas! Thank you, Texas!  (Bonus: Kyle Busch, because of his propensity to throw temper tantrums, wrecked Hornaday under caution in the truck race Friday night, which forced NASCAR to suspend him for the entire race weekend at Texas.  Again, Thank you, Texas! Great driver, but his attitude leaves a lot to be desired...shame, really.).

Me, Mom, Dad, & Aliens:

Post-game activities with my family usually involve talking (or ranting) about the game, reminding each other to breathe, and just relaxing.  This weekend was a little different.

Me, walking into the kitchen and finding my mom peering out the window: "Mom?"

Mom: "Honey, there's a weird light moving outside the kitchen."

Me, a little alarmed and a lot confused: "What do you mean there's a weird light?"

Mom: "The light is bright, a little blueish, and it's moving around the driveway."

Me, cleaning up a bit: "Maybe it's someone with a flashlight?"

Mom: "No, honey, the light isn't low or round like a flashlight. It's midair and it looks like a weird shape...Oh My God, I'm being abducted by aliens," she said with a sigh.  "And here I thought those alien abductions were a little bit fake."

Me, realizing I needed to look at this light: "No, Mom, you're not being abducted by aliens. There must be a reasonable explanation."

Mom: "There is a reasonable explanation--I'm about to meet E.T. Oooh, what if they're not E.T. aliens and they're more like those slimy, smelly, mean ones from Independence Day?"

Me: "Well, then I guess you go all Will Smith on their stinky butts."

Moving to take a look outside, I immediately saw the cause of the mysterious lights.

**I should probably note that my mom is night blind

Me, grinning: "Mom, I think I can safely say you are not going to be abducted by aliens.  It's Dad. He has lights on his head."

Mom: "You're saying your father is growing lights from his head?"

Me: "In a way..."

The back door flew open and in walks my Dad sporting his headband of lights.

Dad: "These are so cool.  I don't have to put the porch lights on, I can finally see under the sink, and, look, it flips from bright to red!" He started flipping the switches to go from bright to red with a big goofy grin on his face.

Me, laughing: "And this would be your alien, Mom."

Mom, shaking her head: "Honey, you have no idea."

Moral of the story: Next time you see a floating light, it might be a man who has discovered the next it-thing in light-up head gear. 


  1. Weekends at your house must be hilarious :p

  2. Haha, what's funnier is that I read, "Me, walking into the kitchen and finding my mom PEEING out the window

    Um, yeah, I guess I'm more tired than I thought. lol

  3. Your dad reminds me of my pa-in-law :-)

    Didn't watch the Cowboys game, but caught the highlights. Anthony Spencer's leap over the offensive line to block that field goal was priceless!!

    The Busch brothers are arrogant boobs. If I were NASCAR, I would have suspended Kyle for the remainder of the season. Even with all the safety equipment nowadays there is ALWAYS the possibility of serious injury/death on the track. For him to have such a careless disregard for his fellow drivers is uncalled for - even if he did feel Hornaday deserved it. Save it for AFTER the race, Kyle!

    Oh, and go Dale Jr.!! :-)

  4. HA!

    We were just discussing these for the Post Office. When it gets dark, delivering can be dangerous. Sadly, I have found they just don't provide enough light to read.

  5. Oh my goodness. I am cracking up! I want one of those headbands so badly now! hahahaha. Love the stories of your parents. You lost me on all the football and racing but you reeled me back in with your parental antics. HUGS

  6. Jay: It's never dull! :)

    Yvonne: LOL--Yep, sure sign of sleep deprivation.

    Cat: :) I really didn't think Hornaday did anything wrong at all--it's racing, he's going for a championship, and needed room to get around the lap Kyle didn't appear to give him. You're right--it would have made a bigger statement had they suspended them for the remaining races; he should have taken care of things after the race, but he just can't control his temper tantrums. He's dangerous and doesn't behave rationally.

    Dale did fantastic! Go Dale!

    Julianna: The one my dad has puts out a surprising amount of light. It has three lights to it, I think, and definitely puts out enough light to read. If you would like, I'll check on the brand and let you know. :)

    Jewels: See, I wanted one too just based on the light it puts out, but then I saw that it goes around the hair...hat head + my hair = very unfortunate look. Oh, my parents are like a living book of laughs. :)*Hugs Back*

    Eva: :) They are a riot.

  7. LOL! We men do love our toys! :) You Dad sounds like a riot!

    And it was a very good weekend for sports here in NYC also! Well, a very good Sunday I should say. And by "sports" I should say just football. But both our teams did exceptional. Best football Sunday around here in ages! Especially that Giants v. Pats game -- whoooboy!

  8. Seriously, just video tape a weekend with your parents. Just make the faces all fuzzy. LOL Your parents are crack-ups!

  9. Ha ha! My hubby just bought one of those forehead lamps so he can read in bed without turning the light on and wake me up. His only comes in one colour.

    Go Dallas! AND my BC Lions whomped Montreal 43 to 1!!!! Yes....43 to 1!!!!
    Go Lions, go Lions, go Lions!

  10. David: :) I saw the end of the Giants/Pats game-WOW. Great game. I love happy-happy, joy-joy sports weekends. :)

    J.Day: LOL--I actually said that to my mom and mentioned how people would have stomach laugh cramps if they saw all of this. lol

    Carole: Oh, dad had to have the multi-color one he could flip from bright to red and back again. lol

    WHOA! 43-1!!! Talk about dominate! Go LIONS!!! Go DALLAS!

  11. My ex-husband really is an alien. Just thought I'd throw that out in the air for everyone to ponder.