Yes, I have a BFF and he's wonderful, like the brother I never had. But my real best friend is my mom. Yesterday's faux-husband incident had us laughing hysterically late last night after the games that we just had to complain about (mainly the Mavericks losing).
My whole life she has said or done things that only happen in movies; things happen to my mom that are just unbelievable--either jaw dropping amazing or seriously embarrassing, but always hilarious.
I inherited the seriously embarrassing, but sometimes hilarious gene. Yeah, not as good, but it keeps life interesting.
My parents and I are so close--they are good, strong, southern people. They've lived their lives doing things the right way...being good to people, even though they haven't always received the same in return. I've seen their hearts break and all I want is to give to them what they have always given me: hope.
When one of my parents isn't well, I fall to pieces. I just cannot imagine my life without them. They are all I have in this world. I want my daddy to walk me down the aisle; I want my mama to see her baby girl in a wedding dress; I want my mama and daddy to be grandparents...they deserve to be.
But with each passing year, I worry I may fail my parents...and fail my heart. Though I know they are proud of me, I feel I owe them more...no, I DO owe them more. And, boy, would they protest if they knew I was thinking this way. They just want me to be happy.
I'm probably not making a bit of sense right now...that's what happens when my heart takes over. Reckon what I'm trying to say is this: I love my parents with all of my heart; they are everything to me.
So, today, when my mama wasn't feeling very well, I couldn't help but wonder if I'm doing the right thing...what if this rather unpopular choice of mine keeps every chance of real love away and my mama never sees me as a bride or a mother? I went through this same thought process earlier in the summer with my daddy.
I begin to think I'm walking down this endless, dark tunnel with no light in sight. I'm panicked.
Then I hear my mama say she's proud of who I am, the choices I've made, and, once again, she gives me hope.