Not long ago, some bride enthusiasts basically condemned my future happiness because I was the weirdo who didn't have her wedding all planned out, from gown and location to flowers and cake. Like I said, I'm not one to put the cart before the horse. Does this mean I don't want to get married? Nah, I don't think so. Could I have latent doubts about marriage, i.e. trusting someone won't break my heart? Well, come on, who doesn't?
After thinking back on my childhood behavior...Houston, we may have a problem.
Exhibit One, Kindergarten, The Princess Leia Mentality: While all the girls huddled around an oddly comforting plastic kitchen set during recess, I balked at the idea of faux-baking and instead accepted an invite by the boys to be Princess Leia in our Star Wars remake. The little girls all said, "If you go play with them, you can never play here." At the time, I didn't care. I'd rather sit in the little spaceship outlined in desks and pretend I'm leaving a message on R2D2 while running from Darth Vader.
The potential problem--Rather than play little homemakers with the girls, I found greater happiness playing a stubborn, strong, independent, laser-gun-wielding princess.
The upside--Princess Leia, for all her strength and stubbornness, fell madly in love with Han Solo...and lived happily ever after. I added the last part. *blushes*
And speaking of Han Solo...
Exhibit Two, Kindergarten, Princess Leia Does The Unthinkable: One day, after narrowly escaping Darth Vader, the little boy who played Han Solo asked me to marry him. I said yes. *pause for the inevitable awwwws* Young love is so sweet...that is until my friend told me during nap that she was really in love with the little boy I was now engaged to. Oh, and she was sobbing. I felt awful. So, what did I do? I gave him to her. I literally told him my friend is sad because she loves you and wants to marry you, so you need hold her hand. Like a typical guy, he jumped spaceship.
The potential problem--Princess Leia gave up her Han Solo!!! That can't be good. I mean, my mama always said I have the biggest heart she's ever seen, but still....Could I have unwittingly cursed myself by giving away my first faux-groom? Did I bust my own karma?
The upside--Well, I was well-intentioned...I hated seeing my friend sad. That has to count for something, right?
Exhibit Three, Make Believe Marriage...to Superheroes: This may be the most damning of all. When I was little, I did, in fact, dress up and pretend to marry...Batman, Superman, and James Bond. Yeah. I blame my dad. The first male figures he introduced me to were quarterbacks for the Dallas Cowboys, superhero figures, and 007. The minute I heard, "Bond, James Bond," I was so the smitten kitten. I never pretend-married someone who couldn't fly, melt stuff with their eyeballs, throw a mean spiral, or perform outrageous escapes in a tuxedo.
The potential problem--Well, hello? Superhero complex, anyone?
The upside--At least I did, you know, pretend to walk down the aisle (we won't mention the rather unique guest list at said wedding or the fact that my groom was in a bat suit and cape).
Am I strong and stubborn? You bet your chicken fried steak I am.
Would I give my hubby away to someone else? Not on your life.
Do I secretly hold men to an impossible standard? Nah, so long as there's trust and love, he'll be a superhero in my eyes.
Still, it might be kinda fun to, you know, dress up like superheroes and...well...
Han, I'm a slave for you.
Fly me to the moon, Superman.
I'm your Bond girl. Shaken, not stirred, 007?