Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Why Wednesday: Why Not Drag Him Along Through The Holidays?

Must make certain I get the quote exactly as presented to me:

Self-proclaimed guru on "hooking" men said: "You know, you could just let a guy think he's going to get some. Just for the holidays. Why not, you know? Just keep putting it off. At least you could say you had someone for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Eve, and Valentine's Day."

Now, this suggestion came in two variations:

Tell him up front about my virginity (because he will understand the need to give me time and his inner ego will still desire to "deflower" the virgin)


Keep it a secret for a time, continue to tell him I'm not ready, and when he looks like he's going to bail, then tell him.  According to the self-proclaimed guru, this method will keep him on the hook for at least another month (apparently, he will still have hope of "nailing the virgin.").

Um...I may be wrong, but isn't this the very definition of "prick tease?" Yeah, I don't do that.

And why is it so catastrophic for a girl (or guy) to be single for the holidays? I'm not saying it's easy, but it's not the end of the world.

Thanksgiving = family, food, and football. (and the parade)

Christmas = spending time with family, decorating, reliving holiday memories, eating loads of pastries, watching holiday classics, listening to merry music. Oh, and the gifts...even if they are from you to you. Notice I list gifts last...honestly, I'd be just as happy on that day if there were no presents at all.

New Year's Eve = admittedly, it sucks to be single on NYE. I always find something to do, whether it's to watch a marathon of my very favorite shows or movies or just hanging with the family. I never go out unless I have a date--blame the kiss-at-midnight-thing.

Vomit, er, Valentine's Day = I have absolutely no use for it. Why do we need a day to tell someone how much we care? Shouldn't that be an everyday-kind-of thing? My tradition? I treat myself to something I absolutely love. Basically, I have declared February 14th a "me day."

So, yes, I'd love to have someone during the major holidays, but I'm not crying in my eggnog. And I'm certainly not going to be some tart and tease a man just to say I had someone on said holidays--that's just plain rude, not to mention lame.


  1. The holidays definately aren't easy single...but you are's not the end of the you save money! :-) So for budget conscious women (like me) it's kind of a perk.

  2. I agree, the only holiday that could possibly be a little more uncomfortable is NYE. I think birthdays are worse than holiday when in the single world, just my 2 cents..

  3. Valentines Day is stupid. I've always thought so and I'm happily in love and think its just stupid!

  4. "Vomit Day" hahahaha My thoughts exactly!

  5. I couldn't agree with you more... Christmas is alright single, NYE is a little less alright, and I have never been one for V Day either... Alessandra has a point too when she mentions birthdays... Not crazy about being single then...

    Oh well, I am single for the holidays, so cheers to us!!!

  6. I have an ex who basically ruined New Years, my birthday and Valentine's. Basically as long as I don't die or wind up hospitalized I deem it a success. I hold no expectations of anything superb happening. As for New Years, I actually ask to work it, because at least I'm around people I like - for the most part. Plus it keeps me busy.

  7. Who are these people you hang around with and why are they so concerned about your virginity... they must have some serious sad lives if they are always picking on you or giving you third rate advice... sweetie, just remain true to yourself... the right guy isn't going to pressure you or bail on you or give up on you because you want to hold on to your virginity... can i come down there and box some of those people in your life between their ears!

  8. You're right, it's not the end of the world if you're singe on holidays. Most of them are family holidays and you can spend them with family. And Valentine's day it's not a real holiday in my opinion, it's commercialized day and I don't see a reason why I should have a "holiday" to tell Mr. Starlight that I love him. I do this every day and if I want to give him a present I certainly don't need a holiday for doing it.
    You don't have to feel bad for not having a boyfriend to spend holidays with, I'm sure you have a nice family and I think it's better to be on your own than to be with someone just for the holidays.

  9. New Year's Eve is overrated. When I did go out a few times as a single gal on that night, I had a really boring time. Just watching other people get drunk and stupid. I prefer to stay home, watch some movies, and make a great dinner.

    As for V-Day, yes, it was a little tough as a single gal, but I will say even though Bud and I say "I love you" every day to each other, it's fun to celebrate on one day--usually at home. Too expensive to go out.
    When I was single (for many, many years!) I would treat myself to something nice, and knew that someday I would have someone to buy a card for on V-Day. Love makes the world go round, and it's worth it to wait for the good stuff than spend every holiday with someone who's "okay" or will do for the moment.

  10. Teases are the worst. Thanks for not doing that. What makes New Years eve special? It's just another day.

  11. I wish I could remember how I let guys know about the V card back in the dating day..but it seems like so long ago! I think it came somewhere after the first kiss, kind of a "unless you plan on marrying me..." thing. So even though there was a fair share of making out, they knew it wasn't going further.
    I don't see what the big deal is for having 'someone' for the holidays. Really...holidays (the real ones..not V-day) are about FAMILY (at least for me) so they are supposed to be spent thusly. *shrugs*

  12. yes...I totally rocked that 'thusly'! ha!

  13. OR, (in contrast to what your friend is saying about the holidays), slaps..I mean thanksgiving is spent with family, christmas is spent with family (and seriously, who brings home a brand new dude over the holidays?) and then, new years. It CAN suck to be single over new years, OR it will just give you a reason to kiss the hottest, single man out there, for no other reason than "No new years kiss for you either, eh?" (and of course, be able to make the new years resolution to be just that tad sluttier this year), and Valentines is just a load of meh.
    Besides, the dudes now have 14 of march, which is officially Steak & Blowjob day, and I mean, I can buy my own chocolate if it keeps me out of the kitchen.

  14. How about all us single girls meet somewhere in the middle for a drink over the holidays? me and kelly at my joy project and average girl could car pool.