Thursday, April 21, 2011

Bad Nut

Late Last Night: After watching Ghost Hunters on Syfy, I shuffled into the kitchen for my nightly handful of nuts. (Go ahead, insert the virgin/nuts jokes here).

I poured a small amount of nuts into a napkin, returned to the comfort of my La-Z-Boy, put on a little Angel, and began munching the nuts.

Somewhere between the desire to have Angel save me from, well, anything, and laughing at Spike (yeah, he's sexy, too), I chomped down on a God awful, sour-like nut.

I have no words for the flavor of this thing, but if I had to guess...hardened-sour-horse's pee might cover it. 

God help me. It was the most disgusting little...GAG.  And so began the gagging.

I promptly removed said vile crap from my mouth and began chugging milk.

Very. Bad. Combination.

Note to self: Hardened-sour-horse's pee flavored nut + milk = horrific taste befitting an ogre.

Mental Image: Tom Hanks, circa Big, just after eating the caviar. Yeah.

After some increased gagging, I grabbed a bottle of water and drank that thing like I'd just eaten dirt.

Did I purchase a jar of nuts manufactured by the makers of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans?

What can make a nut taste THAT bad? Just the thought makes me put a finger to my mouth. Ewy.  Anyone ever had that happen with nuts?

Sometimes you feel like a nut...sometimes you don't...sometimes you never will again--at least not for a little while.


  1. ewwww that's gross. and ewww hardened horse pee i can confidently say i have never heard that phrase before.

  2. YES, I've had that happen to me before!!! I am not going to be very helpful here, but I gotta tell you this. Whenever that has happened to me, it makes me wonder if I bit into a bug. EVERY SINGLE TIME!!! You take your nuts for granted... just chomping down on them without really looking at them... *shudders*

  3. that is nasty. I have never experienced that and I sure hope I never have to.
    hardened horse pee... eww just ewww and no thanks :D

  4. It probably went bad and had fungus growing on/inside it without you knowing. I know, that doesn't make you feel any better . . . but at least its not because a horse pissed in your nuts.

    Or is it?

  5. Aubree: lol Yeah, I didn't know how else to describe it! It was THAT bad and seriously weird.

    Furry Bottoms: Oh God. I think I'm going to hurl. Maybe if I pretend I was on Survivor or something. Thank goodness I used copious amounts of mouth wash afterward. At least I know it can happen. Ick.

    Jax: I hope you don't, either. :/

    Yvonne: Your tellin' me!

    David: Oh. I need a Dramamine. My stomach is flipping. Oh, so disgusting. So very, very disgusting.

    OT: Uh, yeah. Completely. Thank goodness for water and mouthwash...and floss and toothpaste.

  6. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. I may not eat any nuts for a while!

  7. oh that is so not okay! I have been there though. Every now and then you get a bad nut and man are they horrible. I once mistakenly picked up a cup of like 3 day old (left out) milk instead of the fresh one I just poured and proceeded to throw up all over...I was about 9 and my mother was not happy. I feel your pain.

  8. Oh that's just nasty! I'm so sorry you had to eat that. Taste it. Whatever. But I do love the Harry Potter reference you threw in there. lol

    @ Jewels - THAT made me gag! lol

  9. That is bad... but I'm allergic to nuts, so it would have killed me. ;)

  10. ewww sowi! i hate when i'm eating sumn i love and then my taste buds stumble on a very nasty piece lol.

  11. My favourite season is the first, but that’s like having a cake with no icing because Lorne’s not there, and Lorne is the best.

    Sorry, huge Angel fan here. :P

  12. Eva: And after the Mavs lost last night, I'm kinda thinkin' no nuts before a game.

    Jewels: On the one hand, it's good to know this does happen and I didn't stumble across some mutant nut; on the other, I very nearly gagged over the milk story. *Gag*

    J. Day: hehe Thanks. Bertie Bott's was all I could think about after the gagging stopped. lol

    Kat: :P Yeah. Bad.

    Jenner: Oh, Lord! Well, count yourself lucky to never have to stumble across a vile nut. :)

    kitkat: That was the first time that had ever happened. Totally unexpected and way gross.

    Drake: Don't apologize! I'm a huge Angel fan, too! Completely agree about season one and Lorne--he was just so great!!