Bittersweet

Well, after Friday’s Taxes And Singles post, I figured I better clarify a few things for any follower-friends (and new follower-friends) who may question my outlook on the single life. 

On Friday’s post, I received this comment from Anonymous:

Normally, I don't post anonymously, but I don't want your fan base yelling at me.

I love your blog. I honestly do. But it makes me so sad when I read posts like this. The premise of your blog, most of the time, is being a virgin and being proud of the fact that you're not just giving it up for free.

But the rest of the time? You just come across as one of those bitter, bitter single women. I'm sorry you don't have someone in your life right now. I'm sorry that other people in the world do. But just because you're single, I don't think the people who read your blog who are dating/engaged/married/whatever should have to feel badly about that fact.

Bitterness just isn't an attractive quality. The tax form isn't out to get you, or anyone else who's single. It's a one-size-fits-all form.

Let me say right up front: I am not bitter in any way, shape, or form; if for some reason you feel I am bitter, then I am truly sorry you feel that way—it’s not who I am.  I’m just a character like my mama—I joke about being single (like the tax form stuff) and being a virgin (like the cherry juice incident on New Year’s Eve). 

I’m not writing these posts with a horrible outlook on the world or foaming at the mouth from some deep-rooted hatred of being single. Heck, I write with a smile, not a scowl. Maybe it's an issue of my sense of humor not translating on occasion or for some people.

Of course I know the tax form isn’t out to get me like some pencil-sketch-monster from the Power Puff Girls (yeah, I was bored one night—cartoon network can be highly informative).  I reckon you can only know so much about a person through words on a blog, so it’s hard to tell if they’re serious or not. I get that. In person, I would have said the same, but with an added sprinkle of Texas drawl and a smirk to boot—y’all would get me then…hopefully. ;) 

Open Admission to Bitterness: The only thing I’m bitter about is Valentine’s Day, and that’s only because of crappy past V-Day’s (like getting stood-up when the guy found out I was a good girl—that stuff hurts, you know?).  Deep down, I know full well that one good V-Day will erase all those ickster feelings. Does that scream of bitterness to anyone? 'Cause it sure doesn’t to me.

To the Married/Engaged/Relationship Couples: I’m really sorry this commenter, who I assume may be in a relationship, felt sad when reading that post or other ones like it. I never want anyone who is in a relationship or married or engaged to feel sad because I’m single. It’s certainly not my intention. Hell, I’m not sad, so don’t you be, ya hear? ;)

I write about being a virgin…a single virgin. It’s all I know. I don’t know the other side of the coin—I don’t know what it’s like to be married or in love…I haven’t been there yet.  I reckon it's not so different from what the single characters did on Friends or Sex and the City...well, except that I'm a virgin in the single dating world. Good times.  Anyone who is happy with someone else is like sunshine to me because it solidifies my belief in finding the real thing out in this big old world.

The only time I call out a married/relationship/engaged person is if they blast me for my choices or do the whole belittling thing…and I do so because, well, they’re being downright cruel. So, yeah, I’ll post about those instances…but, again, I’m not crying in my milk.

I guess what I’m saying is this: For anyone who may think I spend most of my time cursing couples, while sitting in the corner of my room, crying my eyes out because I’m still single…you’re mistaken. I’m smiling my way through life, just like my mama taught me.

Will I shed a tear or two? Yes, I’m human.

Will I feel sad from time to time? Yes, I’m human.

Do I have days where I wish for someone special in my life? Yes, I’m human.

Will I ever hate on happy couples because they have something I want? Never, I’m human.

My hope runs deep—I wouldn’t be who I am and on this path if it didn’t.  I believe in something extraordinary—I believe in love. And if for some reason it never comes my way…I’ll still be smiling.